Wednesday, December 31, 2008

See Ya Suck-It 2008 - Let's Ring Bring-It 2009

Well ladies and gents, the time has come to officially let 2008 KISS MY ASS pass through, like sands through the hour glass. As I look back on the past year, I feel truly blessed to have survived with my sanity in tact...or at least barely in tact.

SUCK-IT 2008 did not suck for me because of the economy of the world, gas prices, or the outcome of any proposition election decisions made. Let's face it, I have no control over those things, so I'm determined not to let it affect my mood. It may sound Polly-anna like, but trust me, I have to try and stay positive.

SUCK-IT 2008 has sucked for the following reasons:

1) December 2007 wrapped up the year with a glorious trip to Mexico with the family, which I have often referred back to, fantasized about returning. However, the trip was still in the midst of my sister's open heart surgery and so that was how we rang in the new year.

2) When this blog began in October 2007, I was on a "medically-induced sabbatical". I returned in November 2007. January was when my health started to decline again, and the pressures of work started to wear on me.

3) March saw my first major surgery of the year. 3 weeks into my recovery, I was on the road again with my sister, to show our love and support for a dear sweet aunt. What a year this woman had. She is so strong, and we truly love her.

4) In April, Grandma's health start to decline. She had taken a nasty fall in March, and it got worse as she began to lose her will. She ultimately lost her fight in May. Miss you lady!!

5) July, August, September, October, November and December saw the Grandy family dealing with health issues with the youngest Grandy.

6) October saw my 2nd major surgery, after dealing with significant pain through August and September, partnered with extensive painful testing throughout.

7) Sprinkled in throughout the year saw two brother-in-law lay-offs, one brother-in-law major back surgery and pain (my heart breaks for them and I pray he will recover soon), more health scares for sister with the heart surgery, friends laid off, "acquisition" at work, dying pets in the family, and a partridge in a f*cking pear tree.

There were some high spots in 2008, and I tried very hard to focus on those here. I never intended to be about pages and pages of "woe-is-me-isms". Instead, I prefer more and more "Grandy-isms".

So...am I ready to say good-bye to 2008? You BET!!
That's why I'm ready for "BRING-IT 2009"!!

Who's with me?????

I only have one New Year's Resolution...Not to require anesthesia for the year. It can be done... I know it!



Monday, December 29, 2008

Grandy's Word Association

Grandy is returning to work after a few days off, and it's probably for the best. Yesterday, the little Grandy was given the task of cleaning his room...bwuahaha... a task that he would swear was ripped out of the encyclopedia of torture treatment.

I'm not sure why he thinks it would be fun for me if all he does is come out every 15 minutes or so, asking if he can be done yet. Remember...the kid is 12 (and a half) and has really good vision. Why is it only me that sees EVERYTHING on his floor? Wrappers from gifts, coins, some explosion of a bag of sunflower seeds, more coins, is that a sock? candy? UGH!!

When I have to ask, "What is this sticky stuff?!?" then it is time for me to go into the other room, poor myself a big drink and drink, slowly plot his death drink some more, and run away screaming drink even more.

It is pretty sad that I don't mind coming back to work so I don't have to hear, "Can I be done?"

A couple weeks back Storyteller was participating in this, you say...I think thing. Actually, I've seen it go around because I've seen good ol' Mike Golch do this from time to time also. Well you know how good I am at doing what all the cool bloggers do. Yeah...I don't. Either that or I do it so late, it's not cool anymore.

Anywho, I thought it would be fun to share a couple. It's a word association in Grandy-land.


Carpet :: Cleaning
Bottoms :: Up
Music :: Rocks
Nails :: Fake
Watch it! :: Don't Slip
Your life :: Blurs
Candies :: Kill
Chafing :: Hurts
Svelte :: Hot
Ding :: A-Ling

Travel :: Expense
Expensive :: Jewelry
Backspace :: Edit
Traffic noise :: Annoys
Now see here :: WTF?
Vegetables :: Bore
Chat :: Blab
Your calling :: 411
Weekly :: Therapy
Oh! :: Shit!

Hey, it could have been worse.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Grandy Can't Sleep + You Tube

HA!! Grandy sometimes calls hubby this as a pet name...really. Although...I've never done it on television.

This lady doesn't realize her mic is live and calls her hubby an arsehole. YYYYY





He would never make me do this though...




THAT'S FUNNY!!

So reader...have you ever had to publicly apologize?

Do tell...

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Cyber-Birthday Card

Dear Mom;

I write you this note well aware of the possibility that you may not see it. I know you don't always come see what goofy crap I come up with here. I get that you might even hate that I say crap.

While everyone is crazy with the hustle and bustle of the holiday, I wanted to dedicate this post to you. Today you are off doing what it is you do best, taking care of others, while secretly hoping we all forget that today you turn a milestone birthday.

It would be rude of me to reveal your age on the world wide web. I learned that the hard way when I educated the entire girl scout troop that you were not actually 39 when I was 10. Sorry about that, by the way.

So many times your birthday is overshadowed by another important birthday. But today Mom...today is all about you!! I really wish we could all be together this year. But like I said, you are off doing what you do best. You are taking care of others. You have had to nurse me through so much in my lifetime. UGH!! When do you get to take care of yourself?

As I watch Ty grow and witness his pain in the ass attitude evolution of self discovery, I'm amazed you did not kill all five of us growing up! Thank you for all you have done, Mom. You truly are an amazing woman, and a day does not go by that we don't appreciate what you've done for us brats.

Happy Birthday!!

When we get through this "Suck-It 2008", and get done ringing in "Bring-It 2009" we will throw you a proper party...when we can ALL be together. In the same room. At the same time. And not kill eachother.

World...It's Grandy's Mom's Birthday!! You will get plenty of opportunity to wish everyone a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, and every other holiday I am forgetting at the moment. But for now...do Grandy a favor... Drop some bloggy lovin' on my Mom and wish her a Happy 70th Birthday.

Oops!!

Dang IT!!!!!

You didn't see that.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

The Yearly Recap

It's that time of year when Grandy receives letters from her friends that talk all about the year they've had. We love getting these letters as a recap from friends, and although we know some of it is friggin' crap bragging a bit embelished, it is still nice to get these updates. Without these, we might not ever be able to keep track of exactly what Tommy is doing in his Freshman wrestling team.

Well now it's time to put a fun spin on these holiday letters. Who's game??



Dear Family & Friends;

Wow! It's hard to believe that 2008 is already coming to a close. This year has been great for our family! Where should we begin

Uncle Louie finally found his teeth, which helps because he and Aunt Laverne won't have to share hers anymore. Praise Jesus!

Our kids, Leroy, Linus, and the twins, Larry and Larnell are all doing real good. They are all on schedule to graduate the 5th grade together this year. We're really crossing our fingers that Leroy makes it this time. He'll be old enough to drive this year, and that would really help if he could drive his brothers around more, especially with the new baby due in the spring.

Oh yeah! I didn't mention that! Leroy Sr., the love of my life, has been doing real real good. He's been allowed more congi- cong- um- er- one-on-one visits with me at the prison, and we finally have a girl due in the spring. Leroy says it's on account a him being the bitch for a change, that's how he made a girl. Either way, I'm real excited for little miss Lucille to join our family soon.

I've been real fortunate at work. We had a biker convention roll through town and I got all kinds of overtime at the mini-mart. Some of them even tipped me on account I'm pregnant and working through the holidays. That pregnancy card sure can come in handy over the holidays.

Well, I better wrap this up so I can go and wrap the kids' presents. I'm sure you won't tell them, but I got them each their own toothbrushes this year. They will so like not having to share that anymore. I also got them some baseball cards at a yard sale. I don't recognize any of the players, and I can't say any of their names, but the boys love their baseball so I'm sure they'll like 'em.

I hope you all have a great 2009. I'm sorry I don't bother to write or call throughout the year until now. It's only cuz...well you know... I don't really like y'all anyway.

Yours truly,

Me

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Grandy's Office Party





'Tis the season to lose reason!

Fa-la-la La-la la-la La La

Pass the drinks and screw the season!

Fa-la-la La-la la-la La La



It's that time of year boys and girls!! A time of year where we are forced to brave the roads in bad weather. A time where we must share the roads with everyone else on the planet. Our favorite time of year where we all converge on the stores in search of crap gifts for our loved ones.

Throughout the season, the true spirit of the Holidays is truly lost on many. Christmas is not about the sales, the gifts, the crappy weather. It's all about the FUN!!

And what provides a recipe for fun more than the OFFICE "HOLIDAY" PARTY? Alright, because I don't care about being PC here (it's my blog and I can say Christmas if I want to) I am going to call it the OCP - Office Christmas Party.

Grandy's office party rocked like it was 1999 (sing it artist formerly known as...and now known as...whatever your name is). Let's face it, these things are a hoot to attend just for the sheer entertainment value alone. It should almost be a requirement for anyone with a blog to be forced to attend their OCP so they can come back as the roving reporter and spill.

The funny thing about OCPs? Um...helloooooo....WE WORK WITH THESE PEOPLE!!!

We know the saying, "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas."

Well it can't possibly stretch the imagination to, "What happens at the OCP, stays at the OCP." Really. Don't. It's just not worth it.

So...without further adew...Here are some things Grandy overheard at her OCP...

Lady hugging salesman - "What? No Tongue?!?"

Suck-up Salesman of the Year (title not earned for "salesman" by the way) -
"I LOVE that guy!" as he just met the new president of the company. As he walked away, he says to same new president, "Go UTAH!! Give me knuckles MAN!!"

Whoawhohuh??

Lovely young thing (interrupting while Grandy was having a conversation in a group of 6 men)-
"Oh my gosh!! You are not just smart and funny now, girlfriend! You are smart, funny AND HOT!!" (yep...Grandy wanted to hide)

Different Lovely Young thing to Salesman -
"So...what do you want? To go with her? OR me?"
- Really...I can't make this up. There was a finger twirl of the hair happening to. This could have been a complete honest Three's-Company type misunderstanding but...methinks not.

Salesman - "You will save me if she has too much to drink, right?" (for the record? she did...and Grandy did not. Dance Puppet!!)

****

All in all it was a grand party. There were so many people who had not seen me in over a year, and since losing all my weight, that people didn't realize it was me. Then I spoke. I spoke the truth, I spoke the funny, I spoke the real.

Watch out people!!

Oh yeah...and Lovely Young Thing? You are beautiful...you are sweet...guys notice... you don't have to work so hard.

I'm just sayin'

**Edit: Don't know how I forgot about the wonderfully generous gift card the company gave each employee. It was very nice. But the icing on the cake statement for the night?

One Boss Man (while looking at the back of the gift card) - "Mine is EXPIRED! It says 12/12."
Grandy - "Um...It's not a carton of milk. That is for the year."

TOO MUCH FUN!!!

Monday, December 15, 2008

It Could Be Worse

Grandy is going to nominate this poor guy as the winner of today's "SUCKS TO BE YOU AWARD".
Grandy took this pic from her cell phone while hubby was driving. How wonderful that he turned into the same parking lot as us so I could share with the world wide web.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Random Grandy Finally Gets Video

My dear friend Dens, over at Black Cats R Lucky has finally gotten off her ass posted up a meme. To honor the moment, she has tagged me back. I post this in fear that we will lose her from the blogosphere for-evah if I don't.

The Rules:

1. Link to the person who tagged you - Done
2. Post the rules on your blog - Done
3. List 6 random things about yourself - Really? Isn't this entire blog full of all Grandy Randomness??
4. Tag 6 people at the end of your post - UGH! You're killing ME!!! Oh wait, it's doesn't say tag people and piss and moan in the process. I got it.
5. Let each person know they have been tagged and leave a comment on their blog - Ding Dong Ditching...here I come!!!

Hmmm...I can't be the only one thinking it's strange that the rules for 6 random things should have 6 rules. Right? I am the only one?

6 (more) Random things about Grandy:

1) Grandy has never watched an episode of Survivor. Ever. Never. Really. No intention to either.

2) Grandy can't wear just socks on her feet...not more than 5 minutes anyway. There is a strange obsession. I either have to wear slippers, shoes or NOTHING. Never just socks. It's a dry feet thing.

3) While we're on the subject, Grandy has a strange thing with dry skin and chapped lips. Too much of either of these will push me into homocidal OCD tendencies.

4) Grandy doesn't snore anymore.

5) Grandy gets a big kick out of this song on her CD (you will understand when you listen):



6) Speaking of COFFEE, Grandy just bought her first coffee maker 2 weeks ago. It took 1 week to figure out how to set the automatic start.

Now...for the tags.

Joyce-Anne - You're getting very good at playing along in the comments sweet cheeks! Share with us!!

phd in yogurtry - Step out of your sessions and enlighten us with your goodness.

BeeDancer - Alright lovely lady...tell us somethin' bout you in Florida!!

Simply Elegant Girl - This cutie patootie is going have some pretty good stuff I think.

LadyJava - LJ...meet Grandy's readers...Grandy's readers...MEET LJ!!

Dory - Tell us more about you, lady. What you can recall that is. ;)

Thanks everyone!!!

***EDIT: IT WORKED!! THE VIDEO THING WORKED!! There might be hope for Grandy YET!!!***

***P.S. EDIT: Grandy just keeps watching the dang video over and over because really...there are talking pictures on this blog!!!***

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Superhero Symbol Needed

When Grandy posted about The Sweet Old Man it must have triggered something in the erectile dysfunction universe.

NOT kidding!!

Unilaterally the entire erectile dysfunction superheroes, with their capes and strong penis emblems blazen on their tights, keep stalking visiting this blog with their suggestions on how to get one...how to keep one...and how to let one go.

Why is it that? Was it the fact that we questioned the poor man's mobility or dexterity behind the wheel? Was it the fact that we wondered if that lovely number he was with was his wife or his daughter? Or was it something as benign as the fact that the words "old", "man" and "honk" were used (in no particular order) in the same post?

Now the bastards visitors are trying to get their spam in to some other posts.

Personally, I think Vince Neil would be insulted to know that you felt he needed to learn about Viagra at The Crue Review. And really, the "MoFo" part of the NoMoMoFo 2008 was seriously NOT directed at you.

One can only imagine what superheroes will converge on this blog now that the word "penis", "erectile", "dysfunction" and "LIMP" are used. Alright, technically I hadn't used limp before now but really...that is what we're talking about...right?

Where the heck are those spammers that can lift and enlarge your boobs with a pill? That I want to see.

Until then... Fear not dear citizens of Grandy-Land!!

Grandy is prepared to battle all evil spammers, while donning her cape. She is able to burst your bubble with barely a need for her wit. Able to delete your spam with only the strength of a mouse.

Her uniform, however, seems to be lacking that special symbol, however. All the cool superheroes have them. Superman had his "S". Wonderwoman had her Eagle wings draped across her boobs (I think that's what they were), Captain America had...what did he have? A flag and a trash can lid?

The superhero of Grandy-Land needs a symbol.

Any ideas???

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Magic con Queso


See this cheese???

It's MAGIC!!!

It has a way of DISAPPEARING!!

Grandy has nothing up her sleeve, and NO rabbit hidden in her ass hat.

Don't believe me?

Really!!!

Cross my heart and hope to fry!!!

Grandy brings one of these to work every day and 3 times recently when she goes to get it from the fridge...it's GONE.

Grandy will find you, my precious.

Next time...when you disappear from the office ... TAKE ME WITH YOU!!
Must get me some of that MAGIC!!

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Grandy Feels So Pretty

As the mother of a boy, I feel it is my duty to help enlighten my son on what might work with the girls, and what won't.

If Hubby does one of his dumbass man moves cute little mistakes and well...happens to say, "Honey, your 29" inch ass is blocking my 29" screen." (Oh yes he DID...albeit years ago but there is NO statute of limitations on a statement like that!) That opportunity is usually highlighted in the Grandy home as a learning tool for Little Grandy.

You know what I mean, right?

See what your Dad just did, Honey? Yeah? Good. Don't EVER do that! Ever.

Or how about this one???

Grandy says very excitedlyafter dieting for a couple months. - "Look honey!! I don't have to wear your big T-shirts to hide my belly anymore!!"

To which Hubby responds and almost loses his life - "Why? Are you buying bigger shirts?"

See what your Dad just did, Honey? Yeah? Good. Don't EVER do that! Ever.

Now as he is learning to communicate, my son will try to start a statement with, "No offense Mom..." or "Don't take this the wrong way..." And usually we talk about his statements and we separate what is being honest and what is better left unsaid, or if his statement is one that would even make one offended. I'm really quite proud of the way we can talk about these things.

For instance, one night Hubby and I were getting ready to go out and I was putting on my make-up. Ty comes into the bathroom and says, "Ummmm Mom? Don't take this the wrong way, but you look really good without your glasses."

That is obviously a compliment, and I'm training him well. We discussed that when he says something like that, he's paying someone a compliment and doesn't have to start it out with the first part. He said he just didn't want me to worry that I looked bad with them (he's so sweet).

I truly feel he will make a G-R-E-A-T Hubby himself someday. If I can teach my son nothing else, it will be how to communicate with people. I owe him that.

But alas...with every star pupil, there is bound to be a few set backs. ::sigh::

Recently he walks into my bathroom as I'm getting ready to go out (again), my favorite perfume recently spritzed for luck, and he walks in...coughs...GAGS...and says, "Holy crap, MOM!! What's that stink? It's horrible!!"

::sigh::

Oh well. I feel compelled to stay on task and look at the greater good that is being done. Another learning opportunity is before us.

Yeah...you know what you just said? Yeah? Good. Don't EVER do that! Ever.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

PRICELESS

The Grandy family typically goes camping every year for Thanksgiving. For at least the last 7 years we have had turkey in our trailer, at one desert or another. It was perfect! We would order one of those turkey dinners from the store, it would fit perfectly in our oven, and we would feast.

Don't believe me? Take a gander at this pic (taken with Grandy's cell phone; pre-beautiful-camera days)...




Blackened Batcave BATMAN!!! Grandy just realized this pic was taken July 2007. About 18 months and 80 pounds ago...That WAS Grandy's ass on that Quad.

More importantly (no really, get your eyes of the "artist formerly known as" Grandy-Ass) please note my Trailer behind me.

The Grandys LOVED that trailer. It was our main mode of vacationing. Then...Grandy got whiny and started saying stupid stuff like, "It would be nice if we could take a where I wasn't surrounded by nothing but dirt."

Well, Grandy got her wish! (stupid Grandy) Last Thanksgiving we noticed a soft spot on the floor of the trailer. Uh-Oh! Better take it in!! We have really good trailer insurance (of course we do, Grandy works in Insurance) and they'll take care of it.

Well...we take the trailer in. Months go by...surgeries happen...more stuff happens...no trailer yet...Guess what folks! Grandy's trailer ends up being a TOTAL LOSS!!

"WHAT?!?" I know you're asking yourself.

It's true though. That soft spot on the floor was just the start. Apparently water had gotten in and completely rotted out most of the floor under the bed and in spots where we had not known it. We were fortunate because the trailer was covered, and in retrospect, I suppose it was better to find out this way rather than losing our bed on the interstate.

The Grandys had to cancel their Easter 2008 trip to Nevada, their July 2008 trip to Oregon, couldn't take our few trips to Dillon's Beach to go crabbing, etc. By the time Thanksgiving was upon us, we decided we weren't going to let the fact that we didn't have a trailer keep us completely off the dirt. Poor Ty had missed out on some good riding time.

So...Grandy rented a room at a hotel in Reno (which is about 20 miles away from where all our peeps were camping) and checked in about 11:00pm on Thanksgiving. Grandy couldn't sleep that night, the whole holiday just wasn't the same.

The next morning Grandy gets up, feeds her addiction, and slowly makes her way out to the vehicle (pouting), where we have all the bikes tied up on a flat trailer.

As they approach the vehicle, Grandy notices a yellow slip on the windshield. Too big for a ticket? Too small for a flyer? There was one on a truck parked next to us that had a U-Haul trailer attached to it. It was the security guard slip reiterating the parking policy. They tried to say we were blocking another space, and the aisle way, and we couldn't park there. We absolutely were not, we parked WAY OUT to make sure we didn't block anyone (the Grandys are good that way) and were not blocking any aisles.

"What a BOOB!" Grandy says to Hubby while reading the notice.

Then...it appears! The most hysterical coincidence EVER!! It truly made the rest of my day and snapped me out of my stupid pout.

Grandy notices the name of the officer:


a·re·o·la - (ə-rē'ə-lə) - Anatomy; small circular area such as that around the human nipple or an inflamed area around a pimple or insect bite.

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

Not getting to do your traditional Thanksgiving in your trailer? = SUCKY

Getting a parking notice from a putz security guard with too much time on his hands? = SUCKY

Same putz having a name that is an anatomical part of the boobie? = PRICELESS

Monday, December 1, 2008

The Sweet Old Man

I'm in no hurry.

Waiting for you, Mr. REALLY OLD MAN, to cross the parking lot aisle to get to your car.

I see your elderly wife putting the groceries in the trunk of your car, as you slowly limp across the way. Or is that your daughter? You little devil.

You are so cute as I watch you walk so painfully slow. The car behind me honks, as I turn and give them the stink eye. I'm not worried about the fact that you are now slowly walking down the middle of the aisle.

How rude people can be, don't you think? Can't they see this very sweet elderly man taking his sweet time getting to his car? He can't help it if he moves incredibly slow. He's elderly and has lived an entire full lifetime. He's earned the right to move slow.

I find myself smiling, wondering what stories this man could tell me, as he is still walking in front of my car. He's not quite cut that angle to get out of the way, and I actually don't care.

I wonder if he's fought in a war? Or how many? Is that really your wife? (Really, she does look a little young for you.)

As my mind continues to wander, he finally cuts that angle and slowly waddles over to the direction of his car. Your female companion has finished with the few groceries she had. I smile as I think how they will go home and share some conversation over a game of chess or scrabble.

I realized...this man could be my Grandpa. This is why I could reach out and HUG him. So many things about his frame, and his age, that made me think of him.

My mind wanders off to fine memories about Grandpa and I find myself getting all warm and fuzzy.

Then I notice that this sweet man is reaching into his pocket. His hunched frame slowly waddles across the aisle, not quite clear of my small car yet. "What's he getting?" I think to myself.

HOLY CRAP!!

I realized that this old man is getting the dang keys to the car? His female companion/daughter/wife is now in the passenger seat and this man is walking towards the driver's door.

WTF?!?

This man couldn't even move with enough agility to button his own pants and now he's going to DRIVE?!?!?!????????????

S-C-R-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-C-H!!

Any fond walks down memory lane were quickly met with a halt.

Get me out of this dang parking lot before this man can turn the key!!!

Crisis averted... for now.

Whew!!

Sunday, November 30, 2008

NoMoMoFo 2008

November 2008

Grandy resolved to commit suicide to her blog once again to NaBloPoMo.

A daily post...EVERY DAY...come rain or shine.

It's been an interesting month indeed. There was history made, there was plenty of awareness, some fun, and a little bit of stress.

All in all it was a successful month. Grandy went in without a theme for the month because she sucks was not prepared that way. By the way, you must go check wrekehavoc for the last month because her theme kicked butt! Digressing...again...

Grandy knows many of her readers also subscribed to the event, and she is very proud of you for doing so. Even if you couldn't make it all the way through, you made a concerted effort to your blog for the month and that's a win.

As a "reward" Grandy decided to make her own badge for completing another month of craziness.



Well this pic hardly quantifies and captures the month it's been for Grandy so she went in search of a badge she could rip off borrow.

Then she stumbled upon Dory at Can't Remember Diddly! and her fate was sealed. Grandy has PERMISSION to use this thing. What a fun badge to post instead.

Thank you, readers.

Thank you for your patience, your support, and your craziness.

Without you, this blog truly is NOTHING!!!

See you soon!!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Leave a message at the beep.

Grandy is about to embark on a night of craziness fun and frivolity, and can't be here tonight.

Sorry she missed your call but months ago Grandy promised a friend's daughter she would take her to an 18 and over club so she could go "line dancing" for her 18th birthday.

Please leave your message at the beep and she'll get back to you when she regains her senses, feet stop hurting, tomorrow.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPP!!!!

Friday, November 28, 2008

The Yeoman Smith Post

Because I know you are all stuffed out on having gorged yourself on that extra piece of pie (bastards), and some of you are still barely tolerating visiting with family, Grandy is sneaking in this post as a Yeoman Smith Post. You know...the crew member that always went with the away team and you knew which one would not come back? Well...this will be one of those posts that barely gets seen.

Grandy is sneaking away from her holiday fun (don't tell hubby I'm here because he swears I'm obsessed) to share with you how much she "cares".

I can't figure out how to make this layout more appeasing so...SORRY!! Sneaking in...rushing...so little time.

Scroll down, but tell me who your Star Trek character is.

Any Sulus in the group? How about the expendable character?


Your results:
You are Deanna Troi

































Deanna Troi
70%
Uhura
60%
Beverly Crusher
60%
Chekov
50%
Jean-Luc Picard
50%
Geordi LaForge
50%
James T. Kirk (Captain)
45%
Leonard McCoy (Bones)
45%
Will Riker
45%
Data
41%
Mr. Scott
40%
Worf
40%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)
40%
Spock
32%
Mr. Sulu
0%
You are a caring and loving individual.
You understand people's emotions and
you are able to comfort and counsel them.



Click here to take the Star Trek Personality Quiz

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving Smile


Because Grandy hopes someday we can all just get along, sit around the fire, and sing Cumbaya.

Here's hoping this pic I found over at photobuckrt makes you all smile.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Does this make any sense??

Gotta love "the system", that's all I can say!! I vaguely remember mentioning something about this sometime ago (probably a year ago when no one read my blog) but I'm reminded of this again.

The definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result.

When calling our State Disability Department you get the following greeting,

Thank you for calling the California State Disability department. Gracias por llamar...blah blah...For information in English, please press one. Para escuchar (listen) un mensaje en espanol, oprima el numero dos.

Grandy presses 1 and gets the following greeting:

We have a new direct phone number for our spanish speaking customers, that number is...

Really?

I pressed ONE! Why would I need to know this?

Then we get through the process of:

Please enter your social security number; please enter your passcode; please enter the maiden name of your mother's second cousin, twice removed. (ok...maybe only once removed)

We get through that and get.

Wait times of 7-10 minutes may occur if you are calling between the hours of 8am and 10am, Monday Tuesday and Thursday; 10:15 - 2:00 Wednesday and Friday. Ah hell...just be prepared to wait f-o-r-e-v-e-r any day that ends in "y".

Grandy holds her respective 10 minutes, while being subjected to the same trumpet song that I think gets played during any sort of prisoner torture training.

At the end of eternity 10 minutes, there's this:

We're sorry, but the State Disability Department has reached the maximum number of calls in the holding pattern. Please try back again never later.

**Disconnect**

::sigh::

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Sounds Liiiiiiike....

I'm afraid I'm going to follow the lead of my dear bloggy friend, Mrs. G., over at Derfwad Manor. I'm beat...BloMeMo is getting the better of me...and my head has exploded with trying to learn how to post a video here.

So...without further adoo...Grandy presents "Rhyme With Me", suitable for all viewing ages.









Thanks to Google images for keeping me from slitting my throat missing my post.

I will see you all tomorrow!!

Monday, November 24, 2008

A Name Game

Grandy got this one in an email and thought it was pretty silly. Then I found a real close version over at See Hear Speak No Evil. So it was FATE...I had to share.

What better day than a Monday to get your silly on.

1. YOUR REAL NAME: Mary - BORING!

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Marizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (favorite color and animal): Purple Dog - This actually still fits the Gangsta name.

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (Middle Name and street you live on/or neighborhood if it a number): Antoinette Todd Valley - Watch out all you Van Arks.

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name): Grama - Hey...I'm Padme's cousin. I could get a funky hair bun. Wait...I'm someone's Grama in Star Wars? They don't ever live that long...do they?

6. YOUR SUPERHERO / VILLAIN NAME (Your 2nd favorite color and favorite drink/ you can put 'the' in front): The Pink Lemon Drop - Only villains have sexy tramp names.

7. FLY NAME (First 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of last name): Mady - Oooohhh...not so sure about this one. Could be confused with 'May-Day'.

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (parents middle names): Loraine Winner - Shhhhhh...don't tell...maybe I'll use it as a pen name.

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets): Black Sierra - Am I supposed to be depressed now?

10. YOUR HOOD NAME (first 3 letter of your first name and add –iqua)... Mariqua

Plus...the ever popular...

11. YOUR PORN NAME (1st Pet, Street you grew up on): Deede Adams - This one actually works!!

Who else wants to play? Share your answers or tell me where to come look.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Lunchtime Silliness

Scene: Popular chain restaurant near the office. Heavy business area frequented by many professionals. Lots of wait staff on hand preparing for a busy lunch. It's 11:30, just before the main lunch hour. Grandy and Co-Worker friend are having a serious lunch.

Cast: Grandy, Co-Worker Friend (CWF), Freaky Waitress (Freaky)

Grandy and CWF have just ordered their meals and within 5 minutes, the fun ensues.

Freaky: Can I get you ladies anything else?

Grandy: Nope, we're good thanks!

Freaky: Great!! Well, please let me know if I can get you anything else.

CWF: We will, thank you.

Freaky: Great!!

...two minutes go by...

Freaky: How are you ladies doing? Alright? Can I get you anything?

Grandy & CWF: ::blank stares at eachother::

Grandy: Thanks, we're good.

Freaky: GREAT!!

...another two minutes goes by...Grandy and CWF are huddled talking about personal things.

Freaky: ::just appearing:: Aren't you girls thirsty? You're not drinking very much?

::blank stares::

CWF: Well, we're fine. Thank you.

Freaky: GREAT!! Be sure to let me know if I can get you anything!

Grandy: Will do.

...about 5 minutes goes by this time...

Freaky: How are you ladies doing? Can I get you anything?! How is everything?

Grandy: Really? Maybe our lunch? Maybe? If it's ready of course.

Freaky: Oh that! It should be out any minute.

Grandy: Alrighty then. Thanks!!

...2 minutes...Lunch arrives (delivered by someone else).

Freaky: (literally before Grandy gets her first bite in) How is everything? Good? Is it good? Can I get you anything else?!

::blank stares...almost as if we're looking for the candid camera::

Grandy: I think we're okay, but we haven't tried it yet.

Freaky stands there...waiting...staring...watching first bite.

Freaky: Well? How is it? It's good, huh? It looks real good.

Grandy: (with mouth full) Uh-Hmmm.

Freaky: Can I get you anything else?

Grandy: (still chewing and shaking head) Uh-mmm.

By now Grandy is already seeing a Saturday Night Live skit being played out in front of her. CWF is astonished at the enthusiasm of Freaky. There were at least 4 more visits from Freaky before we could even make a significant dent in our meals. It was a strange

...end of the meal...need the check...no sign of freaky.

Where was she? She was off stalking another table.

It took 20 minutes to get the check...from someone else...but the entertainment value was well worth it.

Oh! And did Grandy mention Freaky looked just like this?

This is one thing I love about having this blog. I can find the humor in most things.

FREAKY!!!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

It Boggles the Mind

It's been a while since I've done one of these.

I took the "Which Country Would Represent Your Sexuality?" quiz, but was a little red faced about the results. Remember...my son reads this blog.

This one is harmless...




You Are Boggle



You are an incredibly creative and resourceful person.

You're able to dig deep and think outside the box to get things done.

You are a non linear thinker. You don't like following directions

You draw your inspiration from the strangest places sometimes. You're constantly inspired.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Grandy-isms in YOUR Pictures - Round 1

Remember Grandy's offer to frame your pic for you?

Here's my first creation for BeeDancer. Have you seen BeeDancer's site? She has some great pics of Florida on her site.


Her little Gizmo is adorable!! He looks very smart too.

I'm glad she liked the pic.
Now where are your pics? Email them to me people!! It will be fun!! I can even change the color of the frame to suit your liking.

It's FRIDAY readers!!

I don't subscribe to a ha-choo or a Fun-Friday thingy.

But I'm all about wishing you all a fun one...and bless you!!

See you all tomorrow.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Does this count as hate mail?

Grandy is having quite a week.

Monday: There is an end to my medically induced sabbatical. I am forced to jump back into reality and hit the ground running. I got a B12 shot before starting the week but I still get REAL LOW energy before the end of the day. Then we had this post. What a kicker to to a Monday. When was that B12?

Tuesday: Hubby's birthday. After a long day at work I raced home, set up the b-day thing, had a Scout Committee meeting, came home and finished the b-day thing. How about a B12?

Wednesday: A-C-Q-U-I-S-I-T-I-O-N. I don't know what that means to me but my job will be impacted only in a way that equates to...more work. At least that's how it feels at the moment. Maybe not. Maybe it's just me needing more B12. Had a little issue with the hubby. Still needing that B12.

Today (Thursday): Aftermath. So.Much.Work. The temp that was hired for my position during my medical sabbatical is AMAZING. She did a great job. She gets to join my team, and I'm thrilled to work with her. She's a smart cookie. She wasn't there today (needed a rest after covering my desk for 6 weeks) and is out tomorrow. My brain is still in a fog. Why can't I keep up? Oh yeah...B12

Then tonight, I'm all set to try to focus on something funny to share with my readers tonight. I'm thinkin' there's been way too much serious Grandy around here. Then I stumble across this comment:

Anonymous said...
Why do you refer to yourself in the third person? Actually you seem to go back and forth - third person, first person - I vs. Grandy ...it is very confusing, bad writing - not at all clever...
November 20, 2008 3:49 PM

HAHAHAHA!!

Then it hit...the inspiration for MY funny!! I have nothing funny to share with you tonight, because this comment just sent me into a fit-o-giggle.

I've seen some very good bloggers post about their hate mail. I have even seen wars raged in comments on a blog. There's a great blogger who is having T-Shirts made for her team. All along Grandy has felt a little left out, so to speak. Did no one care enough about Grandy to post a criticism?

Interesting that the post about Hubby is the one they chose to write about because I know dang well it wasn't one of my best works. For crying out loud people...did he/she even read the last line?

The NoBloMeNoMo is killin' me!! 20 posts in a row...back to work...B12...sick kid...YOU try to be clever. GEEZ!!! They can't all be gems!!

Does this count as hate mail? Does it mean I've made it? I don't know what it means I've made it as...but people...GRANDY HAS MADE IT!! Either that...or GRANDY HAS LOST IT!!

So...do you remember what the worst comment was you ever received about your blog? I don't want to know the most hateful thing said to you. I'm not sure I could recover. I just want to know if anyone has ever given you such constructive criticism in your posts? Via email perhaps? Do you remember what it was?

Talk to me and you'll get a funny tomorrow. I promise!!

FRIDAYS ROCK and I can get through MOST things on FRIDAYS!!!

See you all tomorrow!!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Bless His Heart - The ongoing saga

See this handsome devil here in this pic?

Yep! That's my hubs.

We don't have THAT many pics taken together, simply because I usually take the pictures. But world...this is hubby. Hubby...ah hell, you don't even read this dang blog. I happen to secretly suspect you hate this blog because you don't get why blogging is fun for me. But alas, I love you anyway.

Many of you were first introduced to Grandy's hubby in one of her early posts: You bought WHAT??. If you haven't seen this post, might I suggest you take a peak at it because it really will explain A LOT of history.

Yesterday was my darling hubby's birthday. Hard to believe it has been a whole year since I posted this crazy theory, 3 + 8 = 11. And for the record...it still applies.

In honor of Hubby's birthday (and to spare a royal nagging) I snuck in and posted while I was at work, so I could focus my evening on him.
Grandy picked him up a pie...

...some vanilla ice cream...

...had the little guy make him a sign...

...had some cards...

...and settled in for a nice family evening (after a dang scout committee meeting that made my head want to split open).

It was nice. I am a little embarrassed to tell you that I had to give Hubby an I.O.U for his birthday. He wants cash so he can put it towards parts for his Jeep that he is rebuilding. Grandy is a little low on the cash flow at the moment due to her more recent "medically induced sabbatical", so an I.O.U. is going to have to do for now. But he liked it.

Tonight, Grandy came home to find a new tool thingy in her garage.

It's not like it was a new screw driver, Grandy's not that observant. Hubby had bought new tires and wheels for his truck and was driving on them for 3 months before a friend of Grandy said, "Wow! Those are nice new wheels on his truck." WTF?!?

No, this new thingy was holding an engine. I believe it's called a cherry picker? I noticed it last week, but rarely pay attention to things in the Man Cave. Tonight for some reason it peeked my interest.

I sent a text to Hubby's friend because I know he sometimes borrows thingys from him.

Hey...there's a new tool thingy in our garage. Is it urs? Did he borrow or buy?

The response?

What do you want to hear?

Well folks, I had my answer in that one question. I did call said friend and clarified some details with him. The night that Hubby told me he was going over to give him cash two weeks ago for the "windshield wiper blades" that he picked up for him (oh he got those too) was the night he also paid said friend for this cherry-ass-nose-whatever-the-hell-you-call-it picker.

**sigh**
It's not that he bought it. It's that he doesn't tell me these things, and hopes I won't find out.
Go back...read that early post. It will all make sense.

This is where we must insert, Bless his heart comment here. He's lucky I love him.

Grandy is tired...and promises to post about all the excitement since she's been back at work soon. But a word was introduced to Grandy today that she's having to wrap her brain around: A-C-Q-U-I-S-I-T-I-O-N.

Did I mention I'm tired??

See you all tomorrow!! NaBloMeMo is kicking my a$$.


Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Grandy is better now

WOW! I'm re-reading yesterday's post and all I can say is...WOW!

Grandy has always been pretty careful about what she writes here because she tries to keep it fun or meaningful (rarely both). The blog is here to entertain the few that stumble across this blog, and sometimes just crack myself up in the process.

Even on my few rants, I have never felt so welled up with venom and not edited it. Damn that NaBloPoMo and the fact that I was really tired, running out of time, and feeling venomous. I had to get the post in, and it was all I could think about.

You know, Grandy has never taken down a post. This morning when she woke up, she still felt sick about the heartbreak, so she definitely considered it. Little Grandy reads this blog...what was her rant going to show him?

Well time got the better of me today, and I didn't get a chance to edit or delete the post. First thing when I logged in at work this morning, I saw there was already 4 comments (WOW YOU GUYS ARE FAST) to it.

Grandy decided not to delete the post. If there's one thing about this blog that my son has learned about me, is that I'm human. He's seen my posts that have made me laugh and cry. He sometimes doesn't even tell me he's read my post for weeks.

This creative outlet is exactly what it is...an outlet. It can be a healthy one, and sometimes feel cleansing to vent it out. And even if someone from my town were to read this...so be it. Grandy has never been one to say anything about anyone that she is not fully prepared to say TO them (or hasn't already done so already). Need I remind you of my new nickname?

What about you, reader?

Have you ever deleted a post? Thought about it?

What prevented (or pushed) you to take your action?

Monday, November 17, 2008

Minor Ranting Ahead

I'm afraid for those of you who came over to check in on how Grandy's first day back at work went might have to come back after day two.

The fact that I'm currently posting means I have survived.

However, I have a quick little note I'd like to write to someone while I'm still really pissed reeling from it.

Pull up a chair...it could get interesting. Grandy is about to get... UN-EDITED.

*******************************

Dear Coach;

You have coached my son in Basketball for 2 years as a head coach. You coached him one year as an assistant coach. You even coached him in T-Ball for 2 years when he was a wee lad and still picking the daisies in the outfield.

So please tell me...no wait...ENLIGHTEN me as to how I am to explain to my son why you decided that this year he was not good enough for the team. Why you chose to cut 3 of the 7th graders on the 7th grade team, in order to put 3 of the 6th graders on the team? What the hell is this crap about you wanting to start a "core" team for next year?

I am about to sound like a disgruntled parent who whines when her son doesn't get his way. Well for once I am going to say HELL YEAH I'M PISSED!! Grandy is inserting no flippin' diplomacy tonight.

How is it that you promised a spot to a boy (who I will grant you is very talented) who broke his collar bone 2 days before try-outs and can't even play for 4-6 weeks?

YOU explain to my boy why you chose a kid who has NEVER played basketball before over these kids. Living in this small town, I get how you grow to know so many of them.

What about thanking him for begging his mom to take him to try-outs even though he's sick and sounds like a seal in heat. He busts his sick little a$$ for you and where is your own son tonight? Home...with the sniffles...but on the team.

Parents of boys who made the team were outraged at the way you've handled this thing, but Grandy is not going to complain to you in person. She would love to have her molotov moment with you, but will refrain. Grandy is not about to turn this into some sort of thing that would have a negative reflection on her son.

I'm all for competition, and have never been a big fan of equality for every kid because frankly some are better than others. But I will tell you this here...GET OVER YOURSELF!! THEY'RE EFFING 7TH GRADERS!!

As I comforted my broken-hearted 12 year old tonight, who has no voice but wanted nothing more than to just be a part of your team again, my maternal protection surfaced in my throat like vomit in a pregnant woman.

I will see you in town...I will be polite...but know this...I want to kick you hard.

YOU SUCK!!

THE END

Sunday, November 16, 2008

A New Nickname for Grandy

Shortly before my health threw me under the bus took a minor step backwards, Grandy had what she would refer to as a "verbal vomit" with her HR department.

It wasn't intentional. I promise!

It was brewing...and actually quite resembled my A Telegram to our Company post. Really it was a lot like that, but actually worse.

The conversation consisted of "ENOUGH!!"...blah vomit blah... "You want us to take it in the shorts and send you a Hallmark card to boot." ...blah vomit blah... "You have no idea how hard people are working...nor do you care!" ...blah vomit blah... "I got over the whole 'lucky to have a job' emotion 2 weeks after the layoff and now I wonder who got the better end of the deal." ...vomit vomit vomit.

Oh yeah. Grandy went there. Yes she DID!

After the hour-long call with the HR Director, Grandy panicked and realized...um...that could go bad. Well, Grandy's boss wasn't there that day but she knew she didn't like to learn of things through others. So Grandy's next call was to her boss on her cell.

It went something like this:

"HI!! Um...er...You might be getting a call from HR." ...pause... "I didn't mean to, it just kinda happened." ...pause... "I would claim the twinkie defense, if I could eat a twinkie." ...pause...

Finally, after an eternity of silence from her she asks, "What did you do?"

I repeated my conversation providing MOST of the vomit recap.

Her response, "Alright. Thanks for letting me know."

"Sorry!" I told her.

"I know," she said.

The meltdown incited call from the CEO to me, a meeting with the Director and VP and Boss, and a team meeting.

The day I learned I had to have yet another surgery, she called me to her office. I was FREAKED because now they didn't have to keep me. I can be a trouble maker, and I've seriously stepped in it this time. The only thing that could save Grandy right now is that she is DARN good at what she does.

She comes to bring me to her office and says, "Come here, my little Molotov."

She was very sweet and re-assuring. My outburst somehow became a catalyst to open the lines of communication. Workloads were being looked at. Grandy actually had her voice heard, and then had to go have surgery.

I worked very hard with the temp they brought in. I purposely pushed off the surgery as long as pain would allow so this could be done and my team wasn't carrying too much of a burden. But the time came and I had to leave my desk to a very competent temp.

Well...guess what...

Molotov Mary returns to work tomorrow.





Wish THEM luck!

I'll see you all here tomorrow.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Grandy in One Word

I stole this one from KellyO, over at O for Obsessive. It's a one word meme.

Grandy can hardly do anything in just one word. I'm pretty sure if I had to describe a fart, I would have to at least hyphenate it.

So here goes...

Where is your cell phone? Hip
Where is your significant other? Shower
Your hair color? Multi
Your mother? Home
Your father? Heaven
Your favorite thing? FUN
Your dream last night? None
Your dream/goal? Health
The room you’re in? Dining
Your hobby? Blogging
Your fear? Heights
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Here
Where were you last night? Football
What you’re not? Hip
One of your wish-list items? iPod
Where you grew up? Didn't
The last thing you did? Cooked
What are you wearing? Warmth
Your TV? On
Your pet? Family
Your computer? Lifeline
Your mood? Tired
Missing someone? Always
Your car? Beetle
Something you’re not wearing? Make-up
Favorite store? Book
Your summer? Done
Love someone? Tons
Your favorite color? Purple
When is the last time you laughed? Today
Last time you cried? Monday

Whew...I did it!!

See you all tomorrow!!!

Friday, November 14, 2008

World Diabetes Day



Today is World Diabetes Day!!


We tried to get the petition signed over at Google, to have a special doodle in honor of the day, but I guess the f*ckers had other more pressing matters to attend to. Perhaps they were preparing for World Save the Idiot day.

Anywho...this post is all in blue for my peeps at tudiabetes.com so I can send them some normal blood sugar lovin'.

If you are diabetic, or know someone who is, I encourage you to check out this network. They have groups for every type of diabetic, and with people who go through the same things you do...it's nice to know you're not alone.

I want to thank my doctors who work so hard with me to manage my diabetes. I LUV YOU!!


See the rest of you all tomorrow!!!




Thursday, November 13, 2008

Grandy Has a P-R-O-B-L-E-M


Hi. Um...My name is Grandy.

It has been 6 hours since my last...well as some would call it..."big cup of WHY BOTHER".

I call it, "Iced-Venti-Sugar-Free-Fat-Free-Carmel-Macchiato-Yummy-Goodness."

Do you understand why people might call it "WHY BOTHER?" It's because of the sugar-free and fat-free thing. I know. It makes little sense to me too. But trust me...it's goooooood.

The barista beyotches will look at me funny when I order it. Some of them know me by now, and they know I must have it the way I order it. If they put the sugary syrup in there, Grandy get's violently ill. If they put the regular milk in...well nothing happens. It just helps that I keep it on the skinny side.

Then I will get the comment, "Well you know the caramel is not sugar-free."

Um yeah...I know...but you put a little squirt of that in there and it gives it enough of the yummy. Put 4 pumps of sweet syrup in there and Grandy is in your bathroom scaring your customers.

The current problem is...well...the drink is Grandy's problem. This caffeinated goodness has substituted itself in Grandy's daily life as her new liquid crack.

It started out with the tall size (really? why do they call it that?)

Well then Grandy went to the Grande.

Then the Uber Venti size.

Reader. I am almost embarassed to say that this week (twice this week actually) Grandy has bought 2 in one day. I have not bought 2 at the same one, because I just know they will recognize me and know of my problem.

It's yummy goodness has truly taken over my life.

I don't smoke. I hardly drink (it doesn't take much). I can't have any carbonation. No chocolate. No candy. No ice cream. No desserts.

This is the ONLY vice Grandy has...but I fear it is still a dangerous vice to have.

Tell me reader...

Is there hope for me??

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Grandy-isms In Pictures


It's been a while since Grandy has had a chance to play over at Big Huge Labs and she thought it was time to create some new sarcasm for her daily dose of Grandy-isms.



Wanna play? Why not send Grandy a pic and she can give it...how shall we say...UMPH!

My Grandy-isms + Your pics = Magic

Or at least it's good for a couple chuckles anyway.

See you all tomorrow!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

A High School Grandy

The lovely Vixen has tagged me for a meme in her Has the Moon Lost Her Memory post. She tagged me about a week ago, but you know Grandy...late for everything.

In this meme Grandy must share 7 things about herself from...are you ready for this?...High School. Oh yeah...High School Grandy...fun fun! In this case we'll flash back to the f.k.a. (formerly known as) Brundage.


Actual pic of Grandy's High School...Home of the Vikings

1. Brundage/Grandy played goalie in field hockey all four years. It was merely an accident that she ended up as the goalie. In her first game she was playing fullback and lost.her.skirt. How is it she didn't get the memo from ANYONE that you are to wear shorts under the skirt? Hmmmm... A future in the role of goalie was born. Girls wielding sticks at Grandy meant nothing compared to the fact that she did not have to face the fear of losing her skirt (without tequila) again. Goalies don't wear skirts.

Not actual pic of Grandy...but close.

2. Brundage/Grandy has a friend from high school (we're still close) who she made laugh so hard that she shot grape juice out of her nose. Grandy was wearing all white at the time, and to this day has never let her live it down.

3. Brundage/Grandy shared a 1981 AMC Spirit with her twin sister. We shared this car and rocked the hand-me-down generation with it. It had been San Diego Sister's car first, then Brother's (need to come up with a nickname for him) car. By the time it got to us, the gas guage didn't work (among other things). I can't tell you how many times we had to push the dang thing out of an intersection. It was a nice way to meet cute boys...but it did get old.

Ours was blue...but this is dead on!

4. Brundage/Grandy and her girlfriends and twin sister would have tons of sleepovers. **Psssst** ::whispering:: Don't tell Grandy's mom...but they were never rarely supervised. We could party hardy!! I love these girls still today. Good-Times!! Two words...Puddin' Heads!!

5. Brundage/Grandy grew up in an era where it was cool if you woke up and your house was toilet papered. It was "game-on" because it meant that they somehow got by you. Grandy and her friends would constantly wage a secret TP war against only the ones who could take it. Our circle of friends was pretty large, so the target was great. Having at least one driver in the group helped. And lucky for us, a couple of us had older brothers and older friends.

Oh yeah...this was not one of our houses...but we were this good.


6. Brundage/Grandy almost became a Brundage/Something Else. On graduation night I became engaged with my high school sweetheart. He was a sweet kid, and we were both so young. The circumstances of our break-up were painful, and let's face it, an 18 year old Grandy was in no way prepared for "marriage", or anything close to it. I can't imagine what would have happened if my life went by way of the "Ellis". This blog would take on a whole different meaning, that's for sure.

7. Brundage/Grandy was one of those annoying girls who thoroughly enjoyed her high school experience. School was all about the social aspect. Pep rallys, dances, games...we did it all. I'm not sure I could live through it again, but I'm certainly glad I did.

Does this really suprise anyone?? Really?!?

Class of 1990 Rocks!!


I'm tagging everyone for this meme because how fun it is to revisit some of the good times from high school. Besides, some of you NaBloPoMo peeps may need some material to help get you through the month.

Just please make sure you let me know if you're playing along so I can come check it out.

See you all tomorrow!!

**Oh yeah! THANK GOODNESS FOR GOOGLE IMAGES**

Monday, November 10, 2008

Butterflies are Free - A Cute Award



This is a real nice one that I got from Mike Golch, who has bestowed this award upon Grandy.

The rules:

1) post the award to your site andLink back to the person who gave it to you.

2) give it to 10 of you friends,and let them know you gave it to them.

*****************

Well I had missed Mike awarding this to me right around the time I did my last award post, that I thought it was only right that he get his own post.

Thank you, Mike Golch, as this is a lovely award indeed. I like butterflies. I think I can often relate to them because they flitter about and seem easily distracted...Just like me.

So, rather than give it to just 10 bloggers. I'm going to pull a typical Grandy-ism and bestow it upon everyone who's ever commented on my site. I do try to come see you all too. I know you understand that sometimes life and liquid crack can get in the way of my usual visits, but you are all never far from my stalking tendencies pure heart.

Well, what are you waiting for?

Snag the award and let me know when you've posted it! My fellow NaBlo peeps will need a post inspiration anyway. See?!? It's a win WIN for all involved.

Help yourself...and Grandy will see you tomorrow.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

D-Blog Day 2009

Grandy was 6 months pregnant when she got the call.

We need you to go straight to the endocrinologist.
Endo-what?
Endocrinologist!!

From then on it was this:

Blah blah - Count Carbs - Blah - Insulin Shots- Blah blah
Only while you're pregnant - blah blah - "gestational" - blah blah
Blah blah - don't eat crap - blah blah

Well...that was bullsh!t!!

Then there was the ever popular:

Blah blah - you're too fat - blah blah - don't eat crap - blah blah
Just lose weight - blah blah - exercise - blah - don't eat crap - blah

Highest A1C 2007 - 13.4

Latest A1C - 7.7

Grandy is 80 pounds lighter than she was 18 months ago, but guess what?

She's still a diabetic.

So here you go...

Blah blah - I am stronger than this - blah blah - still take insulin shots - blah
gotta take a pill - blah blah - exercise - blah - can't eat crap - blah blah


November 9, 2008 is the 4th annual D-Blog Day.
A day for diabetic bloggers to send a shout out to all other diabetics out there.
If you are diabetic, or know someone who is, let's give a shout out.

You can post this logo on your blog too.
Let's just raise awareness about this disease.
And if you haven't done so, please click the widget over there. --->
Sign the petition to get Google to do their Doodle for World Diabetes Day.

Thanks so much!!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Check-it-Out

Recognize anyone in that NaBloPoMo Badge down there??


Visit NaBloPoMo


Grandy is goin' places!!

Who wants my autograph???

See you tomorrow!!

Friday, November 7, 2008

B U I - Blogging Under the Influence



Grandy has been known to do some stupid things.

All you have to do is read here and of course HERE to remember that.

Today my fine readers, Grandy did the UBER stupid thing.

No...I didn't drive my car into a tree (this week).

Nope...No keys in the trash (again, not this week).

I didn't even drive off with something on the roof (crap, I did do that this week but that's not it).

It's been 5 weeks since Grandy's most recent surgery. She's getting stronger every day but sometimes has a setback. It's been two weeks since she's needed pain meds.

Today Grandy's boys were having an overnight planning meeting with the Boy Scouts and, being that she's a rockin' mom AND the committee chair for the scouts, she decided to treat the scouts and leaders with some snacky foods through the night. She's also getting up at the butt-crack of dawn really early to meet a couple moms to make them all a yummy breakfast.

So...Grandy is going through her list when she remembers, "Oh! I need to get them a flat of water." Grandy...without even thinging about it...picks up a flat.of.water.

It wasn't until I was launching it into the cart that I realized, "WTF GRANDY?"

Temporary stupidity blinded me that this wasn't even a normal flat of water...it felt like the heaviest flat of flippin' water ever made by man.

CRAP!! Grandy is NOT supposed to be lifting anything OVER TEN POUNDS!

I knew right away I was going to be hosed, and could barely get the darn cart pushed around the wharehouse store. I could have cried. You can't imagine my panic as I tried to figure out how I was to get my items to my car now.

I prayed, "Lord, please forgive my stupidity in thinking I could do this by myself. Please get me out of here NOW and give me the strength to have NOT done some permanent damage." Then...my miracle happened.

I rounded the corner and saw a friend of mine who lives up the road, is a nurse, and even came to visit me in the hospital whenever she could on her shift. I don't know if you would understand the magnitude of this, but this Costco is 30 miles from our home. The odds of running into ANYONE I know at this store is slim, but to run into someone that knows me, and knows my health issue without even having to say anything...I then could have really cried.

She saw my face, looked at my cart and sent her son to push my cart. He and his friend, who are both only 10, had no idea why they were helping this woman with her groceries but were thrilled when I paid them each a $1 (hey...it was all I had on me in cash) to unload everything into my car.

It was all I could do to get home and take some meds. Ty ran out to unload the car, and Hubby got home in time to both laugh at me, and help me. I feel bruised in a way that I can't explain.

Please don't tell my Mom. She WILL kill me!! And really...let's face it...I know I screwed up.

Dang IT! I just wish I slowed down sometimes.

No worries...Grandy will be fine...but I might be a little embarassed when I read this tomorrow to see if it makes any sense. I probably shouldn't even be blogging about this. But liquid crack and valium have been the muse for this BUI episode.

Hey! I could start a theme with this. Maybe next time I'll see what I can do about the theory of bottle goggles, and see how we can tie this into a blog post.

I'm going to go take some more meds, get some rest before my breakfast adventure in the morning, and will see you all again tomorrow.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

It's a wonder Grandy's head hasn't EXPLODED!!

Since the surgery, Grandy has felt bitchy...well...hormonal easily frustrated. Little things seem to irritate her more than usual.

Waiting in line at Costco behind a nicely dressed older woman who is clearly spending $300 on merchandise, while she bitches about the validity of a $2.00 coupon, normally would amuse me.

Standing in line at Starbucks at 5:45 AM, while a woman holds up the line while two of the employees are helping her with the super-deluxe-cuisinart-everything-but-the-kitchen-sink-coffee-maker would also not cause Grandy any pause...normally. I mean really, why would it? Maybe she was on her way to a 6:00 am office suck-up party and wanted to beat the crowd.

But even the mild mannered (ever sarcastic) Grandy can only take so much.
The final straw occured over the last week, for a week. Yes, A WEEK PEOPLE.

Some of you might remember Belly Watch 2008 Continues, where I explained my son was having unexplained stomach pains. Well that post was back in July, and here we are in November. Yep, he is STILL having these pains.

A couple weeks back my sweet 12 year-old had to have an endoscopy (scope down the throat) and colonoscopy (self-explanatory). It's a horrible procedure for any grown-up, but it was especially taxing for a 12 year-old. Poor guy.


Well the beautiful doctor specialist did a biopsy and said she would have the results the following week. She said she would call and we would discuss. She is pretty confident he has chronic appendicitis, which means they may take the appendix out.

Here is the trail of what has transpired with this beautiful doctor lady (BDL for short).

Tuesday (last week) - BDL leaves a voicemail on my cell phone at 2:30 saying she has the biopsy results and needs to discuss.
Grandy returns the call at 3pm and leaves a message.

Thursday (still last week) - BDL calls and leaves a voicemail on my cell phone at 8:30am again. Grandy's cell phone doesn't get a great reception at her house but I saw the number and knew it was her. I immediately called the office and...held for 10 minutes...left another message. I asked the lady...could you have her call me at home too? If I'm not at home I'm on the cell but never at the same time.

Friday - Called BDL to discuss the results again...left another message. Please call cell OR home. Please? Carried cell with me everywhere when not at home.

Monday - Yet another effing call to BDL (Grandy's mood is starting to swing downward...quickly). Still clutching the cell phone.


Tuesday - 7:03am...after being up until 5am that morning (different blog post for tomorrow) and we had the following chat:

BDL - Hi! This is Dr. "Beautiful" (ok...not real name...but she truly
IS beautiful)

Grandy - HI!!

BDL - I got a message you called. What's up?

Grandy - Huh? We played phone tag trying to connect and go over his
biopsy results.

BDL - OH! Well it came back clean, but I still think it's that chronic
problem we discussed.

Grandy - Oh, I see.

BDL - I'm going to have a surgeon review and order another CT scan, since he
hasn't had one since July. Then we will have a comparison.

Grandy - ::pausing because I know how he hated the first CT scan::
Oh...alright.

BDL - I'll have the girls in the office coordinate it and get with you to
schedule it.

Grandy - Alright.

BDL - And I know how hard you are to get a hold of, so I'll make sure they
keep trying.

Grandy - Huh?!?!

BDL - Alright, BYE!!

*click*
I couldn't post about this because it's taken 2 days for Grandy to find the humor in the conversation. I mean...WTF? She says I'm hard to get a hold of? By the way...still no call from the girls in the office.

Figures.

Well...there's always tomorrow. At least tomorrow's Friday.

Who's up for some happy hour? Screw the time difference...it's 5:00 NOW.

See you tomorrow!!