Monday, October 8, 2007

You bought WHAT??

Disclaimer: What you are about to read should in no way be misconstrued as a negative reflection of what otherwise appears to be a perfect marriage, made in heaven, for all eternity, blah...blah...blah...Ok, now that we have the disclaimers out of the way (automatically recognizing I deal with these in my "day job") let's talk turkey.

My husband is a buy-a-holic!! Alright, I know that it may not be an actual word, but I'm always of the personal opinion that if you hyphenate the word, it becomes do-able. See how well that works?? Oops, I digress.

The American Heritage Dictionary defines shopaholic as, "A person who shops compulsively or very frequently". My husband doesn't stop at that, see that might allude to someone merely looking to buy items. See, there's all sorts of "shopping"...there's window shopping, impulse shopping, Christmas shopping, etc. However, when you "buy", there's only one true meaning to that...the money's spent.

After over 8 years together, my husband (insert "bless his heart" comment here) still hasn't figured out that it might not be safe to bring a newly acquired vehicle to the house without my permission. Although I say permission, what I really mean is, over my dead body.

I'm not a controlling person, by any stretch of the imagination. However, we currently insure a motorcycle, a jeep, another jeep, a pickup, a beetle (that one's mine), a couple dirt bikes, a couple ATV's, a fishing boat and a toy trailer. We even have a darned golf cart, it doesn't run of course, but it's still in our yard. I should explain that not a single one of these vehicles is "new". Only two of the autos are in this decade, all the rest are 80's or earlier.

When I came home the other night, to a Blazer in my driveway, I did what any considerate wife would do, pulled into the pull through driveway so his friend, the owner of the Blazer, could back out without a problem. Well, my honey said that wouldn't be a problem, "It's ours!" he said proudly (feeling the need to insert another "bless his heart"). Yep, we are currently the proud owners of a 1989 Chevy Blazer. WooHoo!!! (really trying to emphasize my enthusiasm, are you feeling it?)

The difference with this vehicle, and all the others, is that my honey actually discussed this one with me. We talked about it, he said he wanted to get it so he can work on one of the jeeps for our son to learn on and drive. How touching, I thought to myself, he's concerned with teaching my boy how to work on a car so he knows how and can use it when he learns to drive. Who could resist such father/son bonding? What kind of mother would that make me?

Hmmmmmmmmm...but our son is only 11, I'm currently experiencing what I refer to as a "medically induced sabbatical" and because we currently have FIVE road worthy vehicles and TWO people legal to drive them, I didn't think it was such a good idea this time. However, I gave him props, kudos and a big hug for actually discussing this with me. I felt so good, like we've truly grown in our level of communication. You don't know this, but this was a huge step for him.

So, how did we move from this deep level of communication to me dropping my groceries on the front lawn out of sheer shock? Easy, he's a compulsive buy-a-holic. He made all the claims of, "I don't remember you telling me no" to "But when it snows you'll have 4-wheel drive again", "I got it for a really good deal" and even tried the, "Can I get you something to drink?"

What could I say? Take it back? Sell something else? You're on glue? Ok, I've used the glue comment in other, more appropriate times, but couldn't apply it here. The truth is, my husband is a great guy, with a good heart. He works real hard as a truck driver, and he is great with my son..."our" son. Six months after we were married, he adopted my son, and has never treated him any differently.

Does he exercise poor judgement? Sure, but who doesn't?
Could he have picked a better time? You bet!!
Will he do this again?? Survey says...Of coarse!!! Bless his heart!!!


Dawnelle said...

You've got a great attitude! Thanks for the email. Your blog is off to a great start!

Mary said...

Thanks so much for stopping by, Dawnelle!! Coming from a pro like yourself, that means a lot. :)

Hope to see you again sometime!!

Amy Derby said...

Hi Mary,

Your list of all the vehicles in your yard reminds me of one of Jeff Foxworthy's jokes. ;-)

Seriously though, my stepfather and stepbrothers are the same way. One working car and two broken down cars per person is their theory. Makes me kind of happy that I don't drive.

Mary Grandy said...

Oh yes, sometimes I feel like I'm living one of the skits from Jeff Foxworthy's old show. There's more truth in that fiction, I'm afraid.

Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting!! :D

dee/otc said...

Oh Mary, your husband has nothing on my brother when it comes to multiple vehicle disorder. One of my older brothers made buying inoperable cars his hobby...our driveway, at one point, was filled with cars jacked up on cinder blocks. He particularly goes for Chevy Novas. He still "collects" cars but now lives one state over and has plenty of land to "hide" them on.

You're doing great with the blog. Keep it up! Hey, if you want incentive to post everyday (not that this should be a pressure thing), you can head over to group of bloggers vowing to post everyday the month of November.

Mary Grandy said...


Be careful, just because your brother is now one state away, doesn't mean his vehicles won't find their way to your yard. He might think that with more distance between the houses, he has more room for more cars. :)

Thanks for the info on that site. If you can do it, I'll give it a shot!