Sunday, November 30, 2008

NoMoMoFo 2008

November 2008

Grandy resolved to commit suicide to her blog once again to NaBloPoMo.

A daily post...EVERY DAY...come rain or shine.

It's been an interesting month indeed. There was history made, there was plenty of awareness, some fun, and a little bit of stress.

All in all it was a successful month. Grandy went in without a theme for the month because she sucks was not prepared that way. By the way, you must go check wrekehavoc for the last month because her theme kicked butt! Digressing...again...

Grandy knows many of her readers also subscribed to the event, and she is very proud of you for doing so. Even if you couldn't make it all the way through, you made a concerted effort to your blog for the month and that's a win.

As a "reward" Grandy decided to make her own badge for completing another month of craziness.



Well this pic hardly quantifies and captures the month it's been for Grandy so she went in search of a badge she could rip off borrow.

Then she stumbled upon Dory at Can't Remember Diddly! and her fate was sealed. Grandy has PERMISSION to use this thing. What a fun badge to post instead.

Thank you, readers.

Thank you for your patience, your support, and your craziness.

Without you, this blog truly is NOTHING!!!

See you soon!!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Leave a message at the beep.

Grandy is about to embark on a night of craziness fun and frivolity, and can't be here tonight.

Sorry she missed your call but months ago Grandy promised a friend's daughter she would take her to an 18 and over club so she could go "line dancing" for her 18th birthday.

Please leave your message at the beep and she'll get back to you when she regains her senses, feet stop hurting, tomorrow.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPP!!!!

Friday, November 28, 2008

The Yeoman Smith Post

Because I know you are all stuffed out on having gorged yourself on that extra piece of pie (bastards), and some of you are still barely tolerating visiting with family, Grandy is sneaking in this post as a Yeoman Smith Post. You know...the crew member that always went with the away team and you knew which one would not come back? Well...this will be one of those posts that barely gets seen.

Grandy is sneaking away from her holiday fun (don't tell hubby I'm here because he swears I'm obsessed) to share with you how much she "cares".

I can't figure out how to make this layout more appeasing so...SORRY!! Sneaking in...rushing...so little time.

Scroll down, but tell me who your Star Trek character is.

Any Sulus in the group? How about the expendable character?


Your results:
You are Deanna Troi

































Deanna Troi
70%
Uhura
60%
Beverly Crusher
60%
Chekov
50%
Jean-Luc Picard
50%
Geordi LaForge
50%
James T. Kirk (Captain)
45%
Leonard McCoy (Bones)
45%
Will Riker
45%
Data
41%
Mr. Scott
40%
Worf
40%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)
40%
Spock
32%
Mr. Sulu
0%
You are a caring and loving individual.
You understand people's emotions and
you are able to comfort and counsel them.



Click here to take the Star Trek Personality Quiz

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving Smile


Because Grandy hopes someday we can all just get along, sit around the fire, and sing Cumbaya.

Here's hoping this pic I found over at photobuckrt makes you all smile.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Does this make any sense??

Gotta love "the system", that's all I can say!! I vaguely remember mentioning something about this sometime ago (probably a year ago when no one read my blog) but I'm reminded of this again.

The definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result.

When calling our State Disability Department you get the following greeting,

Thank you for calling the California State Disability department. Gracias por llamar...blah blah...For information in English, please press one. Para escuchar (listen) un mensaje en espanol, oprima el numero dos.

Grandy presses 1 and gets the following greeting:

We have a new direct phone number for our spanish speaking customers, that number is...

Really?

I pressed ONE! Why would I need to know this?

Then we get through the process of:

Please enter your social security number; please enter your passcode; please enter the maiden name of your mother's second cousin, twice removed. (ok...maybe only once removed)

We get through that and get.

Wait times of 7-10 minutes may occur if you are calling between the hours of 8am and 10am, Monday Tuesday and Thursday; 10:15 - 2:00 Wednesday and Friday. Ah hell...just be prepared to wait f-o-r-e-v-e-r any day that ends in "y".

Grandy holds her respective 10 minutes, while being subjected to the same trumpet song that I think gets played during any sort of prisoner torture training.

At the end of eternity 10 minutes, there's this:

We're sorry, but the State Disability Department has reached the maximum number of calls in the holding pattern. Please try back again never later.

**Disconnect**

::sigh::

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Sounds Liiiiiiike....

I'm afraid I'm going to follow the lead of my dear bloggy friend, Mrs. G., over at Derfwad Manor. I'm beat...BloMeMo is getting the better of me...and my head has exploded with trying to learn how to post a video here.

So...without further adoo...Grandy presents "Rhyme With Me", suitable for all viewing ages.









Thanks to Google images for keeping me from slitting my throat missing my post.

I will see you all tomorrow!!

Monday, November 24, 2008

A Name Game

Grandy got this one in an email and thought it was pretty silly. Then I found a real close version over at See Hear Speak No Evil. So it was FATE...I had to share.

What better day than a Monday to get your silly on.

1. YOUR REAL NAME: Mary - BORING!

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Marizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (favorite color and animal): Purple Dog - This actually still fits the Gangsta name.

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (Middle Name and street you live on/or neighborhood if it a number): Antoinette Todd Valley - Watch out all you Van Arks.

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name): Grama - Hey...I'm Padme's cousin. I could get a funky hair bun. Wait...I'm someone's Grama in Star Wars? They don't ever live that long...do they?

6. YOUR SUPERHERO / VILLAIN NAME (Your 2nd favorite color and favorite drink/ you can put 'the' in front): The Pink Lemon Drop - Only villains have sexy tramp names.

7. FLY NAME (First 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of last name): Mady - Oooohhh...not so sure about this one. Could be confused with 'May-Day'.

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (parents middle names): Loraine Winner - Shhhhhh...don't tell...maybe I'll use it as a pen name.

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets): Black Sierra - Am I supposed to be depressed now?

10. YOUR HOOD NAME (first 3 letter of your first name and add –iqua)... Mariqua

Plus...the ever popular...

11. YOUR PORN NAME (1st Pet, Street you grew up on): Deede Adams - This one actually works!!

Who else wants to play? Share your answers or tell me where to come look.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Lunchtime Silliness

Scene: Popular chain restaurant near the office. Heavy business area frequented by many professionals. Lots of wait staff on hand preparing for a busy lunch. It's 11:30, just before the main lunch hour. Grandy and Co-Worker friend are having a serious lunch.

Cast: Grandy, Co-Worker Friend (CWF), Freaky Waitress (Freaky)

Grandy and CWF have just ordered their meals and within 5 minutes, the fun ensues.

Freaky: Can I get you ladies anything else?

Grandy: Nope, we're good thanks!

Freaky: Great!! Well, please let me know if I can get you anything else.

CWF: We will, thank you.

Freaky: Great!!

...two minutes go by...

Freaky: How are you ladies doing? Alright? Can I get you anything?

Grandy & CWF: ::blank stares at eachother::

Grandy: Thanks, we're good.

Freaky: GREAT!!

...another two minutes goes by...Grandy and CWF are huddled talking about personal things.

Freaky: ::just appearing:: Aren't you girls thirsty? You're not drinking very much?

::blank stares::

CWF: Well, we're fine. Thank you.

Freaky: GREAT!! Be sure to let me know if I can get you anything!

Grandy: Will do.

...about 5 minutes goes by this time...

Freaky: How are you ladies doing? Can I get you anything?! How is everything?

Grandy: Really? Maybe our lunch? Maybe? If it's ready of course.

Freaky: Oh that! It should be out any minute.

Grandy: Alrighty then. Thanks!!

...2 minutes...Lunch arrives (delivered by someone else).

Freaky: (literally before Grandy gets her first bite in) How is everything? Good? Is it good? Can I get you anything else?!

::blank stares...almost as if we're looking for the candid camera::

Grandy: I think we're okay, but we haven't tried it yet.

Freaky stands there...waiting...staring...watching first bite.

Freaky: Well? How is it? It's good, huh? It looks real good.

Grandy: (with mouth full) Uh-Hmmm.

Freaky: Can I get you anything else?

Grandy: (still chewing and shaking head) Uh-mmm.

By now Grandy is already seeing a Saturday Night Live skit being played out in front of her. CWF is astonished at the enthusiasm of Freaky. There were at least 4 more visits from Freaky before we could even make a significant dent in our meals. It was a strange

...end of the meal...need the check...no sign of freaky.

Where was she? She was off stalking another table.

It took 20 minutes to get the check...from someone else...but the entertainment value was well worth it.

Oh! And did Grandy mention Freaky looked just like this?

This is one thing I love about having this blog. I can find the humor in most things.

FREAKY!!!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

It Boggles the Mind

It's been a while since I've done one of these.

I took the "Which Country Would Represent Your Sexuality?" quiz, but was a little red faced about the results. Remember...my son reads this blog.

This one is harmless...




You Are Boggle



You are an incredibly creative and resourceful person.

You're able to dig deep and think outside the box to get things done.

You are a non linear thinker. You don't like following directions

You draw your inspiration from the strangest places sometimes. You're constantly inspired.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Grandy-isms in YOUR Pictures - Round 1

Remember Grandy's offer to frame your pic for you?

Here's my first creation for BeeDancer. Have you seen BeeDancer's site? She has some great pics of Florida on her site.


Her little Gizmo is adorable!! He looks very smart too.

I'm glad she liked the pic.
Now where are your pics? Email them to me people!! It will be fun!! I can even change the color of the frame to suit your liking.

It's FRIDAY readers!!

I don't subscribe to a ha-choo or a Fun-Friday thingy.

But I'm all about wishing you all a fun one...and bless you!!

See you all tomorrow.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Does this count as hate mail?

Grandy is having quite a week.

Monday: There is an end to my medically induced sabbatical. I am forced to jump back into reality and hit the ground running. I got a B12 shot before starting the week but I still get REAL LOW energy before the end of the day. Then we had this post. What a kicker to to a Monday. When was that B12?

Tuesday: Hubby's birthday. After a long day at work I raced home, set up the b-day thing, had a Scout Committee meeting, came home and finished the b-day thing. How about a B12?

Wednesday: A-C-Q-U-I-S-I-T-I-O-N. I don't know what that means to me but my job will be impacted only in a way that equates to...more work. At least that's how it feels at the moment. Maybe not. Maybe it's just me needing more B12. Had a little issue with the hubby. Still needing that B12.

Today (Thursday): Aftermath. So.Much.Work. The temp that was hired for my position during my medical sabbatical is AMAZING. She did a great job. She gets to join my team, and I'm thrilled to work with her. She's a smart cookie. She wasn't there today (needed a rest after covering my desk for 6 weeks) and is out tomorrow. My brain is still in a fog. Why can't I keep up? Oh yeah...B12

Then tonight, I'm all set to try to focus on something funny to share with my readers tonight. I'm thinkin' there's been way too much serious Grandy around here. Then I stumble across this comment:

Anonymous said...
Why do you refer to yourself in the third person? Actually you seem to go back and forth - third person, first person - I vs. Grandy ...it is very confusing, bad writing - not at all clever...
November 20, 2008 3:49 PM

HAHAHAHA!!

Then it hit...the inspiration for MY funny!! I have nothing funny to share with you tonight, because this comment just sent me into a fit-o-giggle.

I've seen some very good bloggers post about their hate mail. I have even seen wars raged in comments on a blog. There's a great blogger who is having T-Shirts made for her team. All along Grandy has felt a little left out, so to speak. Did no one care enough about Grandy to post a criticism?

Interesting that the post about Hubby is the one they chose to write about because I know dang well it wasn't one of my best works. For crying out loud people...did he/she even read the last line?

The NoBloMeNoMo is killin' me!! 20 posts in a row...back to work...B12...sick kid...YOU try to be clever. GEEZ!!! They can't all be gems!!

Does this count as hate mail? Does it mean I've made it? I don't know what it means I've made it as...but people...GRANDY HAS MADE IT!! Either that...or GRANDY HAS LOST IT!!

So...do you remember what the worst comment was you ever received about your blog? I don't want to know the most hateful thing said to you. I'm not sure I could recover. I just want to know if anyone has ever given you such constructive criticism in your posts? Via email perhaps? Do you remember what it was?

Talk to me and you'll get a funny tomorrow. I promise!!

FRIDAYS ROCK and I can get through MOST things on FRIDAYS!!!

See you all tomorrow!!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Bless His Heart - The ongoing saga

See this handsome devil here in this pic?

Yep! That's my hubs.

We don't have THAT many pics taken together, simply because I usually take the pictures. But world...this is hubby. Hubby...ah hell, you don't even read this dang blog. I happen to secretly suspect you hate this blog because you don't get why blogging is fun for me. But alas, I love you anyway.

Many of you were first introduced to Grandy's hubby in one of her early posts: You bought WHAT??. If you haven't seen this post, might I suggest you take a peak at it because it really will explain A LOT of history.

Yesterday was my darling hubby's birthday. Hard to believe it has been a whole year since I posted this crazy theory, 3 + 8 = 11. And for the record...it still applies.

In honor of Hubby's birthday (and to spare a royal nagging) I snuck in and posted while I was at work, so I could focus my evening on him.
Grandy picked him up a pie...

...some vanilla ice cream...

...had the little guy make him a sign...

...had some cards...

...and settled in for a nice family evening (after a dang scout committee meeting that made my head want to split open).

It was nice. I am a little embarrassed to tell you that I had to give Hubby an I.O.U for his birthday. He wants cash so he can put it towards parts for his Jeep that he is rebuilding. Grandy is a little low on the cash flow at the moment due to her more recent "medically induced sabbatical", so an I.O.U. is going to have to do for now. But he liked it.

Tonight, Grandy came home to find a new tool thingy in her garage.

It's not like it was a new screw driver, Grandy's not that observant. Hubby had bought new tires and wheels for his truck and was driving on them for 3 months before a friend of Grandy said, "Wow! Those are nice new wheels on his truck." WTF?!?

No, this new thingy was holding an engine. I believe it's called a cherry picker? I noticed it last week, but rarely pay attention to things in the Man Cave. Tonight for some reason it peeked my interest.

I sent a text to Hubby's friend because I know he sometimes borrows thingys from him.

Hey...there's a new tool thingy in our garage. Is it urs? Did he borrow or buy?

The response?

What do you want to hear?

Well folks, I had my answer in that one question. I did call said friend and clarified some details with him. The night that Hubby told me he was going over to give him cash two weeks ago for the "windshield wiper blades" that he picked up for him (oh he got those too) was the night he also paid said friend for this cherry-ass-nose-whatever-the-hell-you-call-it picker.

**sigh**
It's not that he bought it. It's that he doesn't tell me these things, and hopes I won't find out.
Go back...read that early post. It will all make sense.

This is where we must insert, Bless his heart comment here. He's lucky I love him.

Grandy is tired...and promises to post about all the excitement since she's been back at work soon. But a word was introduced to Grandy today that she's having to wrap her brain around: A-C-Q-U-I-S-I-T-I-O-N.

Did I mention I'm tired??

See you all tomorrow!! NaBloMeMo is kicking my a$$.


Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Grandy is better now

WOW! I'm re-reading yesterday's post and all I can say is...WOW!

Grandy has always been pretty careful about what she writes here because she tries to keep it fun or meaningful (rarely both). The blog is here to entertain the few that stumble across this blog, and sometimes just crack myself up in the process.

Even on my few rants, I have never felt so welled up with venom and not edited it. Damn that NaBloPoMo and the fact that I was really tired, running out of time, and feeling venomous. I had to get the post in, and it was all I could think about.

You know, Grandy has never taken down a post. This morning when she woke up, she still felt sick about the heartbreak, so she definitely considered it. Little Grandy reads this blog...what was her rant going to show him?

Well time got the better of me today, and I didn't get a chance to edit or delete the post. First thing when I logged in at work this morning, I saw there was already 4 comments (WOW YOU GUYS ARE FAST) to it.

Grandy decided not to delete the post. If there's one thing about this blog that my son has learned about me, is that I'm human. He's seen my posts that have made me laugh and cry. He sometimes doesn't even tell me he's read my post for weeks.

This creative outlet is exactly what it is...an outlet. It can be a healthy one, and sometimes feel cleansing to vent it out. And even if someone from my town were to read this...so be it. Grandy has never been one to say anything about anyone that she is not fully prepared to say TO them (or hasn't already done so already). Need I remind you of my new nickname?

What about you, reader?

Have you ever deleted a post? Thought about it?

What prevented (or pushed) you to take your action?

Monday, November 17, 2008

Minor Ranting Ahead

I'm afraid for those of you who came over to check in on how Grandy's first day back at work went might have to come back after day two.

The fact that I'm currently posting means I have survived.

However, I have a quick little note I'd like to write to someone while I'm still really pissed reeling from it.

Pull up a chair...it could get interesting. Grandy is about to get... UN-EDITED.

*******************************

Dear Coach;

You have coached my son in Basketball for 2 years as a head coach. You coached him one year as an assistant coach. You even coached him in T-Ball for 2 years when he was a wee lad and still picking the daisies in the outfield.

So please tell me...no wait...ENLIGHTEN me as to how I am to explain to my son why you decided that this year he was not good enough for the team. Why you chose to cut 3 of the 7th graders on the 7th grade team, in order to put 3 of the 6th graders on the team? What the hell is this crap about you wanting to start a "core" team for next year?

I am about to sound like a disgruntled parent who whines when her son doesn't get his way. Well for once I am going to say HELL YEAH I'M PISSED!! Grandy is inserting no flippin' diplomacy tonight.

How is it that you promised a spot to a boy (who I will grant you is very talented) who broke his collar bone 2 days before try-outs and can't even play for 4-6 weeks?

YOU explain to my boy why you chose a kid who has NEVER played basketball before over these kids. Living in this small town, I get how you grow to know so many of them.

What about thanking him for begging his mom to take him to try-outs even though he's sick and sounds like a seal in heat. He busts his sick little a$$ for you and where is your own son tonight? Home...with the sniffles...but on the team.

Parents of boys who made the team were outraged at the way you've handled this thing, but Grandy is not going to complain to you in person. She would love to have her molotov moment with you, but will refrain. Grandy is not about to turn this into some sort of thing that would have a negative reflection on her son.

I'm all for competition, and have never been a big fan of equality for every kid because frankly some are better than others. But I will tell you this here...GET OVER YOURSELF!! THEY'RE EFFING 7TH GRADERS!!

As I comforted my broken-hearted 12 year old tonight, who has no voice but wanted nothing more than to just be a part of your team again, my maternal protection surfaced in my throat like vomit in a pregnant woman.

I will see you in town...I will be polite...but know this...I want to kick you hard.

YOU SUCK!!

THE END

Sunday, November 16, 2008

A New Nickname for Grandy

Shortly before my health threw me under the bus took a minor step backwards, Grandy had what she would refer to as a "verbal vomit" with her HR department.

It wasn't intentional. I promise!

It was brewing...and actually quite resembled my A Telegram to our Company post. Really it was a lot like that, but actually worse.

The conversation consisted of "ENOUGH!!"...blah vomit blah... "You want us to take it in the shorts and send you a Hallmark card to boot." ...blah vomit blah... "You have no idea how hard people are working...nor do you care!" ...blah vomit blah... "I got over the whole 'lucky to have a job' emotion 2 weeks after the layoff and now I wonder who got the better end of the deal." ...vomit vomit vomit.

Oh yeah. Grandy went there. Yes she DID!

After the hour-long call with the HR Director, Grandy panicked and realized...um...that could go bad. Well, Grandy's boss wasn't there that day but she knew she didn't like to learn of things through others. So Grandy's next call was to her boss on her cell.

It went something like this:

"HI!! Um...er...You might be getting a call from HR." ...pause... "I didn't mean to, it just kinda happened." ...pause... "I would claim the twinkie defense, if I could eat a twinkie." ...pause...

Finally, after an eternity of silence from her she asks, "What did you do?"

I repeated my conversation providing MOST of the vomit recap.

Her response, "Alright. Thanks for letting me know."

"Sorry!" I told her.

"I know," she said.

The meltdown incited call from the CEO to me, a meeting with the Director and VP and Boss, and a team meeting.

The day I learned I had to have yet another surgery, she called me to her office. I was FREAKED because now they didn't have to keep me. I can be a trouble maker, and I've seriously stepped in it this time. The only thing that could save Grandy right now is that she is DARN good at what she does.

She comes to bring me to her office and says, "Come here, my little Molotov."

She was very sweet and re-assuring. My outburst somehow became a catalyst to open the lines of communication. Workloads were being looked at. Grandy actually had her voice heard, and then had to go have surgery.

I worked very hard with the temp they brought in. I purposely pushed off the surgery as long as pain would allow so this could be done and my team wasn't carrying too much of a burden. But the time came and I had to leave my desk to a very competent temp.

Well...guess what...

Molotov Mary returns to work tomorrow.





Wish THEM luck!

I'll see you all here tomorrow.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Grandy in One Word

I stole this one from KellyO, over at O for Obsessive. It's a one word meme.

Grandy can hardly do anything in just one word. I'm pretty sure if I had to describe a fart, I would have to at least hyphenate it.

So here goes...

Where is your cell phone? Hip
Where is your significant other? Shower
Your hair color? Multi
Your mother? Home
Your father? Heaven
Your favorite thing? FUN
Your dream last night? None
Your dream/goal? Health
The room you’re in? Dining
Your hobby? Blogging
Your fear? Heights
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Here
Where were you last night? Football
What you’re not? Hip
One of your wish-list items? iPod
Where you grew up? Didn't
The last thing you did? Cooked
What are you wearing? Warmth
Your TV? On
Your pet? Family
Your computer? Lifeline
Your mood? Tired
Missing someone? Always
Your car? Beetle
Something you’re not wearing? Make-up
Favorite store? Book
Your summer? Done
Love someone? Tons
Your favorite color? Purple
When is the last time you laughed? Today
Last time you cried? Monday

Whew...I did it!!

See you all tomorrow!!!

Friday, November 14, 2008

World Diabetes Day



Today is World Diabetes Day!!


We tried to get the petition signed over at Google, to have a special doodle in honor of the day, but I guess the f*ckers had other more pressing matters to attend to. Perhaps they were preparing for World Save the Idiot day.

Anywho...this post is all in blue for my peeps at tudiabetes.com so I can send them some normal blood sugar lovin'.

If you are diabetic, or know someone who is, I encourage you to check out this network. They have groups for every type of diabetic, and with people who go through the same things you do...it's nice to know you're not alone.

I want to thank my doctors who work so hard with me to manage my diabetes. I LUV YOU!!


See the rest of you all tomorrow!!!




Thursday, November 13, 2008

Grandy Has a P-R-O-B-L-E-M


Hi. Um...My name is Grandy.

It has been 6 hours since my last...well as some would call it..."big cup of WHY BOTHER".

I call it, "Iced-Venti-Sugar-Free-Fat-Free-Carmel-Macchiato-Yummy-Goodness."

Do you understand why people might call it "WHY BOTHER?" It's because of the sugar-free and fat-free thing. I know. It makes little sense to me too. But trust me...it's goooooood.

The barista beyotches will look at me funny when I order it. Some of them know me by now, and they know I must have it the way I order it. If they put the sugary syrup in there, Grandy get's violently ill. If they put the regular milk in...well nothing happens. It just helps that I keep it on the skinny side.

Then I will get the comment, "Well you know the caramel is not sugar-free."

Um yeah...I know...but you put a little squirt of that in there and it gives it enough of the yummy. Put 4 pumps of sweet syrup in there and Grandy is in your bathroom scaring your customers.

The current problem is...well...the drink is Grandy's problem. This caffeinated goodness has substituted itself in Grandy's daily life as her new liquid crack.

It started out with the tall size (really? why do they call it that?)

Well then Grandy went to the Grande.

Then the Uber Venti size.

Reader. I am almost embarassed to say that this week (twice this week actually) Grandy has bought 2 in one day. I have not bought 2 at the same one, because I just know they will recognize me and know of my problem.

It's yummy goodness has truly taken over my life.

I don't smoke. I hardly drink (it doesn't take much). I can't have any carbonation. No chocolate. No candy. No ice cream. No desserts.

This is the ONLY vice Grandy has...but I fear it is still a dangerous vice to have.

Tell me reader...

Is there hope for me??

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Grandy-isms In Pictures


It's been a while since Grandy has had a chance to play over at Big Huge Labs and she thought it was time to create some new sarcasm for her daily dose of Grandy-isms.



Wanna play? Why not send Grandy a pic and she can give it...how shall we say...UMPH!

My Grandy-isms + Your pics = Magic

Or at least it's good for a couple chuckles anyway.

See you all tomorrow!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

A High School Grandy

The lovely Vixen has tagged me for a meme in her Has the Moon Lost Her Memory post. She tagged me about a week ago, but you know Grandy...late for everything.

In this meme Grandy must share 7 things about herself from...are you ready for this?...High School. Oh yeah...High School Grandy...fun fun! In this case we'll flash back to the f.k.a. (formerly known as) Brundage.


Actual pic of Grandy's High School...Home of the Vikings

1. Brundage/Grandy played goalie in field hockey all four years. It was merely an accident that she ended up as the goalie. In her first game she was playing fullback and lost.her.skirt. How is it she didn't get the memo from ANYONE that you are to wear shorts under the skirt? Hmmmm... A future in the role of goalie was born. Girls wielding sticks at Grandy meant nothing compared to the fact that she did not have to face the fear of losing her skirt (without tequila) again. Goalies don't wear skirts.

Not actual pic of Grandy...but close.

2. Brundage/Grandy has a friend from high school (we're still close) who she made laugh so hard that she shot grape juice out of her nose. Grandy was wearing all white at the time, and to this day has never let her live it down.

3. Brundage/Grandy shared a 1981 AMC Spirit with her twin sister. We shared this car and rocked the hand-me-down generation with it. It had been San Diego Sister's car first, then Brother's (need to come up with a nickname for him) car. By the time it got to us, the gas guage didn't work (among other things). I can't tell you how many times we had to push the dang thing out of an intersection. It was a nice way to meet cute boys...but it did get old.

Ours was blue...but this is dead on!

4. Brundage/Grandy and her girlfriends and twin sister would have tons of sleepovers. **Psssst** ::whispering:: Don't tell Grandy's mom...but they were never rarely supervised. We could party hardy!! I love these girls still today. Good-Times!! Two words...Puddin' Heads!!

5. Brundage/Grandy grew up in an era where it was cool if you woke up and your house was toilet papered. It was "game-on" because it meant that they somehow got by you. Grandy and her friends would constantly wage a secret TP war against only the ones who could take it. Our circle of friends was pretty large, so the target was great. Having at least one driver in the group helped. And lucky for us, a couple of us had older brothers and older friends.

Oh yeah...this was not one of our houses...but we were this good.


6. Brundage/Grandy almost became a Brundage/Something Else. On graduation night I became engaged with my high school sweetheart. He was a sweet kid, and we were both so young. The circumstances of our break-up were painful, and let's face it, an 18 year old Grandy was in no way prepared for "marriage", or anything close to it. I can't imagine what would have happened if my life went by way of the "Ellis". This blog would take on a whole different meaning, that's for sure.

7. Brundage/Grandy was one of those annoying girls who thoroughly enjoyed her high school experience. School was all about the social aspect. Pep rallys, dances, games...we did it all. I'm not sure I could live through it again, but I'm certainly glad I did.

Does this really suprise anyone?? Really?!?

Class of 1990 Rocks!!


I'm tagging everyone for this meme because how fun it is to revisit some of the good times from high school. Besides, some of you NaBloPoMo peeps may need some material to help get you through the month.

Just please make sure you let me know if you're playing along so I can come check it out.

See you all tomorrow!!

**Oh yeah! THANK GOODNESS FOR GOOGLE IMAGES**

Monday, November 10, 2008

Butterflies are Free - A Cute Award



This is a real nice one that I got from Mike Golch, who has bestowed this award upon Grandy.

The rules:

1) post the award to your site andLink back to the person who gave it to you.

2) give it to 10 of you friends,and let them know you gave it to them.

*****************

Well I had missed Mike awarding this to me right around the time I did my last award post, that I thought it was only right that he get his own post.

Thank you, Mike Golch, as this is a lovely award indeed. I like butterflies. I think I can often relate to them because they flitter about and seem easily distracted...Just like me.

So, rather than give it to just 10 bloggers. I'm going to pull a typical Grandy-ism and bestow it upon everyone who's ever commented on my site. I do try to come see you all too. I know you understand that sometimes life and liquid crack can get in the way of my usual visits, but you are all never far from my stalking tendencies pure heart.

Well, what are you waiting for?

Snag the award and let me know when you've posted it! My fellow NaBlo peeps will need a post inspiration anyway. See?!? It's a win WIN for all involved.

Help yourself...and Grandy will see you tomorrow.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

D-Blog Day 2009

Grandy was 6 months pregnant when she got the call.

We need you to go straight to the endocrinologist.
Endo-what?
Endocrinologist!!

From then on it was this:

Blah blah - Count Carbs - Blah - Insulin Shots- Blah blah
Only while you're pregnant - blah blah - "gestational" - blah blah
Blah blah - don't eat crap - blah blah

Well...that was bullsh!t!!

Then there was the ever popular:

Blah blah - you're too fat - blah blah - don't eat crap - blah blah
Just lose weight - blah blah - exercise - blah - don't eat crap - blah

Highest A1C 2007 - 13.4

Latest A1C - 7.7

Grandy is 80 pounds lighter than she was 18 months ago, but guess what?

She's still a diabetic.

So here you go...

Blah blah - I am stronger than this - blah blah - still take insulin shots - blah
gotta take a pill - blah blah - exercise - blah - can't eat crap - blah blah


November 9, 2008 is the 4th annual D-Blog Day.
A day for diabetic bloggers to send a shout out to all other diabetics out there.
If you are diabetic, or know someone who is, let's give a shout out.

You can post this logo on your blog too.
Let's just raise awareness about this disease.
And if you haven't done so, please click the widget over there. --->
Sign the petition to get Google to do their Doodle for World Diabetes Day.

Thanks so much!!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Check-it-Out

Recognize anyone in that NaBloPoMo Badge down there??


Visit NaBloPoMo


Grandy is goin' places!!

Who wants my autograph???

See you tomorrow!!

Friday, November 7, 2008

B U I - Blogging Under the Influence



Grandy has been known to do some stupid things.

All you have to do is read here and of course HERE to remember that.

Today my fine readers, Grandy did the UBER stupid thing.

No...I didn't drive my car into a tree (this week).

Nope...No keys in the trash (again, not this week).

I didn't even drive off with something on the roof (crap, I did do that this week but that's not it).

It's been 5 weeks since Grandy's most recent surgery. She's getting stronger every day but sometimes has a setback. It's been two weeks since she's needed pain meds.

Today Grandy's boys were having an overnight planning meeting with the Boy Scouts and, being that she's a rockin' mom AND the committee chair for the scouts, she decided to treat the scouts and leaders with some snacky foods through the night. She's also getting up at the butt-crack of dawn really early to meet a couple moms to make them all a yummy breakfast.

So...Grandy is going through her list when she remembers, "Oh! I need to get them a flat of water." Grandy...without even thinging about it...picks up a flat.of.water.

It wasn't until I was launching it into the cart that I realized, "WTF GRANDY?"

Temporary stupidity blinded me that this wasn't even a normal flat of water...it felt like the heaviest flat of flippin' water ever made by man.

CRAP!! Grandy is NOT supposed to be lifting anything OVER TEN POUNDS!

I knew right away I was going to be hosed, and could barely get the darn cart pushed around the wharehouse store. I could have cried. You can't imagine my panic as I tried to figure out how I was to get my items to my car now.

I prayed, "Lord, please forgive my stupidity in thinking I could do this by myself. Please get me out of here NOW and give me the strength to have NOT done some permanent damage." Then...my miracle happened.

I rounded the corner and saw a friend of mine who lives up the road, is a nurse, and even came to visit me in the hospital whenever she could on her shift. I don't know if you would understand the magnitude of this, but this Costco is 30 miles from our home. The odds of running into ANYONE I know at this store is slim, but to run into someone that knows me, and knows my health issue without even having to say anything...I then could have really cried.

She saw my face, looked at my cart and sent her son to push my cart. He and his friend, who are both only 10, had no idea why they were helping this woman with her groceries but were thrilled when I paid them each a $1 (hey...it was all I had on me in cash) to unload everything into my car.

It was all I could do to get home and take some meds. Ty ran out to unload the car, and Hubby got home in time to both laugh at me, and help me. I feel bruised in a way that I can't explain.

Please don't tell my Mom. She WILL kill me!! And really...let's face it...I know I screwed up.

Dang IT! I just wish I slowed down sometimes.

No worries...Grandy will be fine...but I might be a little embarassed when I read this tomorrow to see if it makes any sense. I probably shouldn't even be blogging about this. But liquid crack and valium have been the muse for this BUI episode.

Hey! I could start a theme with this. Maybe next time I'll see what I can do about the theory of bottle goggles, and see how we can tie this into a blog post.

I'm going to go take some more meds, get some rest before my breakfast adventure in the morning, and will see you all again tomorrow.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

It's a wonder Grandy's head hasn't EXPLODED!!

Since the surgery, Grandy has felt bitchy...well...hormonal easily frustrated. Little things seem to irritate her more than usual.

Waiting in line at Costco behind a nicely dressed older woman who is clearly spending $300 on merchandise, while she bitches about the validity of a $2.00 coupon, normally would amuse me.

Standing in line at Starbucks at 5:45 AM, while a woman holds up the line while two of the employees are helping her with the super-deluxe-cuisinart-everything-but-the-kitchen-sink-coffee-maker would also not cause Grandy any pause...normally. I mean really, why would it? Maybe she was on her way to a 6:00 am office suck-up party and wanted to beat the crowd.

But even the mild mannered (ever sarcastic) Grandy can only take so much.
The final straw occured over the last week, for a week. Yes, A WEEK PEOPLE.

Some of you might remember Belly Watch 2008 Continues, where I explained my son was having unexplained stomach pains. Well that post was back in July, and here we are in November. Yep, he is STILL having these pains.

A couple weeks back my sweet 12 year-old had to have an endoscopy (scope down the throat) and colonoscopy (self-explanatory). It's a horrible procedure for any grown-up, but it was especially taxing for a 12 year-old. Poor guy.


Well the beautiful doctor specialist did a biopsy and said she would have the results the following week. She said she would call and we would discuss. She is pretty confident he has chronic appendicitis, which means they may take the appendix out.

Here is the trail of what has transpired with this beautiful doctor lady (BDL for short).

Tuesday (last week) - BDL leaves a voicemail on my cell phone at 2:30 saying she has the biopsy results and needs to discuss.
Grandy returns the call at 3pm and leaves a message.

Thursday (still last week) - BDL calls and leaves a voicemail on my cell phone at 8:30am again. Grandy's cell phone doesn't get a great reception at her house but I saw the number and knew it was her. I immediately called the office and...held for 10 minutes...left another message. I asked the lady...could you have her call me at home too? If I'm not at home I'm on the cell but never at the same time.

Friday - Called BDL to discuss the results again...left another message. Please call cell OR home. Please? Carried cell with me everywhere when not at home.

Monday - Yet another effing call to BDL (Grandy's mood is starting to swing downward...quickly). Still clutching the cell phone.


Tuesday - 7:03am...after being up until 5am that morning (different blog post for tomorrow) and we had the following chat:

BDL - Hi! This is Dr. "Beautiful" (ok...not real name...but she truly
IS beautiful)

Grandy - HI!!

BDL - I got a message you called. What's up?

Grandy - Huh? We played phone tag trying to connect and go over his
biopsy results.

BDL - OH! Well it came back clean, but I still think it's that chronic
problem we discussed.

Grandy - Oh, I see.

BDL - I'm going to have a surgeon review and order another CT scan, since he
hasn't had one since July. Then we will have a comparison.

Grandy - ::pausing because I know how he hated the first CT scan::
Oh...alright.

BDL - I'll have the girls in the office coordinate it and get with you to
schedule it.

Grandy - Alright.

BDL - And I know how hard you are to get a hold of, so I'll make sure they
keep trying.

Grandy - Huh?!?!

BDL - Alright, BYE!!

*click*
I couldn't post about this because it's taken 2 days for Grandy to find the humor in the conversation. I mean...WTF? She says I'm hard to get a hold of? By the way...still no call from the girls in the office.

Figures.

Well...there's always tomorrow. At least tomorrow's Friday.

Who's up for some happy hour? Screw the time difference...it's 5:00 NOW.

See you tomorrow!!

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Do you see a resemblance?

Today Grandy saw the eye doctor.

Well...she only saw him for a little while actually.

Getting the eyes dilated is a once of year party for Grandy. Last year they put 2 drops in my eyes and it took 2 days for the eyes to recover.

Today the nurse was impressed with how quickly my eyes reacted after the first drop, that she spared me the 2nd drop. YAY NURSE LADY!!

When I was done, they gave me some funny looking glasses. Not the big bulky kind, but these looked like 3-D glasses. They were horrible...and Grandy played the part.

I had to go back to my other doctor's office looking like this...


And guess who Grandy was mistaken for?



Huh!! I'm not seein' it myself.

Good thing I shaved my mustache first thing this mornin'!!

See ya tomorrow!!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Ding-Dong-Done!

Grandy has never considered this blog to be political. Far from it.

However, I have voiced my enthusiasm in the past that regardless of the outcome, this was a history making night. What a fight...what significant propositions we were faced with.

Congratulations to President-Elect Obama.

Yay to everyone who voted!! Congratulations to you all for celebrating that freedom we have!

Yay IT'S DONE!!

This is my first big election as a blogger. I have watched so many blogs take one direction or another. Some have evolved into completely political blogs, while some have just voiced their rants concerns on one candidate or proposition, or the other. I think that the bloggy world took on a whole new realm during this election.

I now envision everyone in bloggy-dom lounging around the couch, Al Bundy style, as if they have eaten too much turkey at Thanksgiving. I picture everyone being just a bit hung over from all the data we've been processing.

I am so grateful to everyone because I consider myself more well-informed this year. I did more research, on my own, that really helped me in my own convictions. I don't go into those convictions here, because I also celebrate the freedom of keeping those convictions to myself.

I have nothing wonderfully superb to contribute to this history-making night. So I will not try to compete.

I am just thrilled to have been a witness to it...and to do so with my family.

And Grandy is Ding-Dong-Done!!

See you all tomorrow!!

Monday, November 3, 2008

And the Wiener Is...

First of all readers...why is it when Grandy visits dictionary.com (because Grandy is tired and can't tell if she is spelling this important word) and enters the word WIENER there are STILL ads for politics and propositions?

I cannot be the only one to see the irony in the word WIENER triggering politics. Oh yeah...Grandy is counting the seconds to the end of this election, and I wish a great deal of luck to all the candidates, the advocates, and the voters. This will be an historic election event and know that because of the issues and the people involved, it is not going to be an easy one.

Anywhoo...digressing...

With the craziness of the day (and I promise to post about that tomorrow) it is 11:30pm and I'm almost failing on day 3 of NaBlo.

**Sigh**

Making it in under the wire...but still making it! Oooh! That should be Grandy's new motto!! See!! A Grandy-ism!!

In 200th Post - Another Grandy-Ose Contest I promised a random drawing. With that random drawing there was to be an award of 1000 EC Credits or a $25 Gift Certificate. I did offer to up the ante if I got enough comments, but alas...I can't even bribe 50 comments.

**Sigh...again**

Kidding...I have enough rockin' readers that I had more comments than ever. Thank you to all who played.

And the WIENER is... (Grandy likes that word)

Oh CRAP!! I always have a hard time when trying to link to this babe. Here goes...

Jenn @ Juggling Life - You'll have to tell me how you'd like your gift card, Jenn. CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Yep! Jenn...you're Grandy's new WIENER!!!

Thanks to everyone for playing along, and being a part of 200 posts of Grandy.

See you all tomorrow!!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Does Yours Look Like THIS?

The Grandy family is not what you would call...domestically inclined.

It's not that our house is filthy, nor would it qualify for an episode of How Clean Is Your House? but I must say that even this Grandy has had her limit.

I saw the surgeon for a follow-up on Friday, and although he hasn't released me to go back to work, he has said I can start going back to certain activities. As much as I hate to say it, the home in Grandy-land is needing some serious attention.

The boys have really done their best to try and step up (insert "bless their hearts" comment here) and help out. They have washed their own clothes for about a month...with only minor incident. Ty has been faithfully doing the dishes, dusting, and getting the mail at least once a week. I couldn't even recreate the happy dance he did when he realized the belt on the vacuum was broken...one less chore.

But last weekend (the first days I could start driving) I had decided it was time to prepare for the battle. I have GOT to do something! I knew I was going to see the doc this week and was hopefully going to be allowed to get my clean on.

Well...I've been given the green light (in moderation of course) and am going to commence this today. I will try to tackle a room every day.

But today?

Today I must start HERE:




I took this pic on Monday...when I was having my nervous frickin' breakdown epiphony. Some of this has already resolved itself.

  • 2 big bags of candy - Donated to the church for their Harvest Festival.
  • Target bags - They housed the other random cleaning supplies that Grandy decided she must have.
  • Purse - It's been moved...I promise.
  • Big hefty bags in the back - Those are clothes that no longer fit me (since I've lost tons) and they've been delivered to the thrift store.
  • Curio cabinet - It was delivered a while ago (it was Gramma's) but now has a home. Please don't ask why it was placed there...and NO I didn't move it myself. They just needed my direction.

Can you find the object that slays me the most? Really? Look REAL HARD.

How many of you can claim to have an Elvis Hound Dog on their dining room table. How about an Elvis Hound Dog NEXT to a camping lantern?

No? Just the Grandys? Really??

Oh...those Lysol Gloves and I are SO going to be friends today.

Unless you want to come see what's at the bottom of this pile...Grandy will see you all tomorrow!!

OH! And I promise to announce the winner of my 200th Post - Another Grandy-Ose Contest tomorrow.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

The Dad Double Standard

Welcome one and all to the kick-off of Grandy's NaBloPoMo 2008.

WOOT WOOT!!

I toiled over what prolific post to share with you all. Do I make these posts profound? Do I focus on what stirs the imagination?

Ah hell, you're still talking about Grandy here. You know darn well it's going to be all about what makes you laugh til you pee she likes, and hopes you like in return.

So...Allow me to introduce you to the observation Grandy made over the last couple days.

We all know there is a double standard when it comes to raising boys versus raising girls. What's the saying? When you raise a boy, you only have one boy in town to worry about...but when you raise a girl, you have ALL the boys in town to worry about.

This was so clearly evident when Grandy asked her friend, DF, a question about a "boy/girl" party they were having at their house for Halloween, where Ty was invited to participate. I then asked hubby the same question...and it's amazing the different responses.


DF = father of a 7th grade daughter

Me: Will we be rotating through, peeking in on the activities in the garage during the party?


DF: Hell YEAH!! I'll be out there most of the time.


Hubby = father of a 7th grade son

Me: I asked DF if we would be peeking in on the kids during the party.


Hubby: What the hell would we need to do that for?? Let them be!


Oh boy...it's a good thing this daughter and the son are "just friends".



**Picture of little guy Grandy before school on Halloween. He wasn't allowed to wear a mask so he was forced to be a ghoul monster having a bad hair day.**

Hope everyone had a great Halloweenie!!

SEE YOU TOMORROW!!!