I Couldn't Make This Up...PROMISE!

It was Cinco de Mayo 2002.

I had not been drinking but rather had just thrown a bridal shower for my future sister-in-law.

I got home and realized I was dangerously low on insulin and would have to drive the 17 miles into town to get it before the pharmacy was to be closed the next day.

Oh wait...before I go, I need to check the mail. Drive to corner, and park my 1998 Chevy Blazer across the street from the mailbox (the only time ever that I park there because hubby has been nagging me to do so) and get out to check the mail on the opposite corner.

As I turned the key to the mailbox, I hear a funny sound. Tires on loose gravel? Nah...can't be.

Slow turn...YEP...My car is driving itself UPHILL!!! WTF?

I run to catch up to it just as the front right tire caught the corner of my property, prompting it to turn. YEP...my car (still without a driver) has now driven uphill AND made a right turn!!

My biggest fear is that it will head down the hill just past my house and either hit another car head on or take out a child. I am now running alongside my car!! Where is candid camera??

I get the door open and grab the steering wheel...just in time for that lovely right front tire to catch the lip of the property again and make a right turn ON the property...now down hill.

I mentioned I had just thrown a bridal shower, so I was looking cute in my little spring overall outfit. However, the overalls did not come in handy when I lost my footing (still running beside vehicle but now damn thing has picked up speed going downhill) and fell. The overall strap caught on something either on the door or on the seat...who the heck cares...all I know is I am no longer "running" along side the vehicle. I am being DRAGGED along side the damn thing.

Through the wooden fence...then through a vegetable garden wired fence (oh yea...that stung a bit) and the vehicle finally came to a stop after colliding with our poor tree.

I am pleased to announce that no tree was actually harmed during this stunt...it was stripped a little naked, but heck, so was I. The tree even has it's own cross with a dedication to the event (I'm surrounded by smarta$$e$). But the Blazer had almost $9000 damages. As for the fences? Hubby apparently had wanted to take those down anyway, although I'm quite certain their was an easier way to do so.

What I found out later is that the way the hill was angled, stopping the car where I did made me think I had put it in park. When I got across the street, the AC kicked on just enough to rev up the RPM just enough to give it motivation to get up the rest of the hill. Pair this up with the fact that I was apparently already low blood sugar...quite the recipe indeed.

Imagine Grandy, who at the time worked as an auto injury claims adjuster, calling in this claim to her carrier. **whispering**"Look...all I can say is the car drove off by itself! Make it my fault and send the appraiser!!

Did I mention that I truly am like Lucille Ball? I've got tons more of these.