Wednesday, October 31, 2007


I thought I was getting much better at this online blogging thing. I was actually even kind of proud of myself when I learned how to put pictures on (knowing I don't even have a digital camera). However, when my son came to me and asked if he could have a MySpace page I panicked.

Me: Ummmm....NO!
Ty: Why NOT? Alex and some of the others have one!!
Me: Ummmm....So?
Ty: That doesn't seem fair.
Me: You're too young, and the truth is...I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MYSPACE!! Is your homework done? (That one gets the subject changed every time)

Whew!! Crisis averted...for the next week...until the next time it comes up.

So, here I this internet world. I've been writing more, doing research, why not see what I can find out about MySpace? Well, what I've learned is that...I know nothing!!

It is a pretty cool networking tool (not telling you anything new I'm sure). I located friends from college, once I started my own page. That's a funny thing because then I felt compelled (obsessed) with trying to make my page look kinda normal. You know, like I didn't just stumble into the site? (Like I did) I don't think I've fooled anyone and again, I couldn't even do a search to find myself.

Ahhhhhh....the perpetual search of finding one's it truly in a fortune cookie?? I don't think it's in MySpace...maybe it's just in MyCookie! Now there's a network!!!

What's Your Score??

You Passed Your Driver's Test

Congratulations, you got 8/10 correct.
You're a good driver - at least, when you want to be.

Funny thing about this doesn't tell you which ones you got wrong.

It MUST have been the ones that questioned the alcohol sobriety. Darn it...I always get that one wrong.

Monday, October 29, 2007

High Quality H2O Boy can't be considered America's Pastime, but it definitely is a fun sport to watch. I have always followed football, and considered myself a fan of the sport, until this year. This is the year I was introduced to football as a player's mom, and realized I knew absolutely nothing about it. Let me tell you, there needs to be a chapter in the parent how-to book for football alone.

What an experience!!

My son has played sports, mind you. A couple years of tee-ball and soccer, several years with swim team and basketball. This year we "tried out" for the football team. They could only keep 35 players on the team and there were 46 trying out. Add that to the fact that there was a weight limit for his team, and my son started out 5 pounds over that 3 weeks before the deadline date. I was nervous for him, but realized this is the way it's been done so many times before and it truly is a lesson on so many levels. (Translated by my husband to, "It's good for him...toughens him up!")

So...this kid tries out for the team, starts watching what he eats better (including cuts out any sodas) and makes the team on his own. The first time it's a make or go home scenario, he works really hard, and gets it. He made weight with a few pounds to spare and was thoroughly enjoying the game.

Left interesting position in that you aren't allowed to actually "tackle". I considered myself a fan before, but see how little I knew? Whouda thunk?? And...can anyone explain to me what makes the special team so special?? SO MUCH TO LEARN!!

Fast forward a few weeks, he injures his wrist after only getting to play in a couple games. I was so disappointed for him! He was devastated!! What to do??

I explained to him that he was still very much part of the team, and he was going to cheer them on anyway. At the time we had no idea what type of injury it was, or how long he would be out, so we made sure he still went to practice to learn the plays and watch the team. At the games he was absolutely the BEST water boy ever!! I'm not just saying that because I'm the mom, he really hustled, tasted the water and overall took his team's hydration very seriously. He was enthusiastic before every game, and really cheered them on.

When it looked like he was going to be out the rest of the season, he continued going to practice and cheering the team on. His doctor didn't want him re-injuring himself with only two weeks left in the season, so she kept him out with a note. He was again disappointed, but never missed a game, and went to most practices (except when he was sick).

Then, the chance that no one could have expected. The team made it to the playoffs!! To my knowledge, as vast as it is about the team and the sport, this team had never made it to the playoffs. This was his chance? One of the coaches told him, "Hey, the doctor said you couldn't get tackled for two more weeks! This will be the 3rd week!! Are you in?" Ouch!! Ty tells me he doesn't care what he has to do, he's going to play in the playoffs.

After some schedule issues (I was out of town) we finally got the clearance for him to play. He couldn't be more excited. He was nervous, and landed on it wrong the first practice, but he made it through. There was some secret (man to man) conversation between Hubby and Ty and after that the wrist was no longer an issue.

Talk about drama you could only get from a movie...will he get to play? Won't he? Who will be the new water boy? The ending?? The team lost 35-6...Bummer!! It didn't happen that way in the movie!!

I was proud of him though. So very proud!! He taught me a lot about his spirit through his enthusiasm, and how he can turn things around. He also reminded me that while we watch fathers all over the place lose their minds about their sons in this sport, he truly learned what it was to be part of a team and had fun in the process.

Now...that's my "High Quality H2O Boy"!!

I'm Baaaaaaack!!

People of the blogging world...FEAR NOT!! The great and powerful, plucky side-kick Mary, has returned!! Have you missed me? Did you notice I was gone? Probably not, but oh well, I'm back anyway. (Eeyore has now left the building)

Remember my article about relaxation, and my MIS? Well, I was off trying to relax, and unfortunately had a week where I just had nothing to offer. Does that mean I'm getting better at relaxing?? I found that my mind spent a week in some sort of writing coma. I was reading and researching with other blogs, but I have to say that I just wasn't feeling remotely funny or witty. Have you seen some of these other blogs?? THEY ARE AMAZING!!

However, I am back to reality (I really was physically somewhere else but can't tell you where...will have to sneak that in to other blogs) and ready to give it a shot. Only a few days left until NaBloPoMo and I better tune up the gears. It's great to see you all back!!

Oh never did leave did you??

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Nope, Just FAT!

One of my fellow rookie blogging buddies, dee/otc, is pregnant with twins, and "awesome" (that one's for your post Dee). As she chronicles her pregnancy, and size (she slays me with her humor, check out What is the answer?) she prompted me to recall how horribly rude and thoughtless people can be about large and/or pregnant women.

"The Question" = WHEN ARE YOU DUE??

"The Question" that launches emotions on so many levels, but has come to evoke such a negative connotation that people are (as well they should be) afraid to ask.

Here are the stages when it may not be wise to ask:
  • Newly Pregnant - No one can visibly see the baby but you are still in the happy stages of the pregnancy. You actually TELL people and when they ask "The Question" you are thrilled to tell them.
  • Poor Thing Stage - Now you are at that stage. People who perhaps haven't seen you in a while, start to suspect something is up. You poor thing, you must be putting on weight. You feel you MUST somehow work your pregnancy into the discussion so people know you're not just getting fat. This is the stage where you hope they ask "The Question" so you can put their mind at ease (and you feel better).
  • I can't Wait Stage - You've made it past the looking chubby stage and that seed officially grown into a full grown melon. The problem with this stage is that people usually alter "The Question" or add to it by asking, "It must be ANY time?" When I was 7 months pregnant, a woman actually said to me "Oh my, you look like you are due any day!!" Yeah lady, I wish. You start to get most uncomfortable, and READY for this lovely cue ball to make it's grand entrance in the world.
  • Just Popped Stage (aka Poor Thing Part DUH) - This one is really not a good time to ask a woman "The Question". Their bellies tend to go back to where they were at the Poor Thing stage. If she happens to be in the store, heaven forbid without the baby, she won't have proof she's just been through it. Not to mention, her hormones are all over the map with a little one turning her nipples into grated cheese, her organs trying to smush back to where they were before, and let's not forget the lack of sleep thing.
  • Nope, I'm just FAT Stage - This one is my personal favorite. Why, you ask?? All of these stages I have personally experienced, but I have lived with this one the longest. There is a woman that works at a specialty shop that I frequent once a month, or so, that asks me EVERY TIME I go in to the store. (Really, since I've been going there for a couple years now, you would think I would have a whole litter by now!) The first time I was absolutely horrified because there were men and their sons at the counter. I just told her "Not for a while". That was a mistake because then she wanted to know more, do you know whether you are having a boy or a girl? Have you picked out names? How does your son feel about it? OMG...SHUT UP LADY!! I couldn't get out of there fast enough. From then on, I explain it simply with, "Nope, I'm Just FAT". It actually works pretty well, given the horrified look I get in return. They're painfully embarrassed, and I feel better already. (does that make me evil?)

Want to know the funniest thing about "The Question"? Most men wouldn't be caught dead asking it. Women of the world should feel proud that we have shamed them enough to know better.

So, how is it that it is the WOMEN who are so ignorant to still think "The Question" is okay? Are we in some secret society that I forgot about? Do these same women also subscribe to the "It's OK to Rub a Stranger's Belly Club"? If that is the case, is there an Unsubscribe button for these clubs???

Please...PLEASE direct me to that link!!

I'm afraid it would be my luck, however, that once I found the link, and clicked it, it would take me to a site that reads:

Thank you for requesting to unsubscribe from this club. Unfortunately we are unable to honor your request due to the volume of other women who fail to exercise their "clue" clause. We appreciate your continued patience.


Thursday, October 18, 2007

10 Items or LESS

Sometimes when I have these ranting thoughts of "What's up with that?" I often feel like I've entered the world of Jerry Seinfeld. That show was so wrong, and yet so good. Jerry, Elaine, George and Kramer did and said things that many of us only thought and giggled about.

Who doesn't remember, "Man Hands", "Close Talker" and "Bubble Boy". Those are just a few of my favorites. Of course you have the infamous "Soup Nazi". I can't wash my hands in a restaurant's bathroom without thinking about that episode with the pizza (although having a momentary memory lapse on the episode).

So, how is it that I find myself in the midst of the Seinworld?? He had a knack for asking the question...WHY?? Today, as with many days, I find myself asking the same question, but a little less diplomatic. Mine typically consists of WTF??

So...the source of today's ranting? The "Express" lane at the grocery store. I notice more and more stores have their own Self Check-Out, but I don't try those. I barely go to the ones that I have to bag the groceries myself. I just have this fear of holding everyone up. So, I try to be courteous. If writing by check, I have it mostly filled out, waiting for the total. If paying by card, I'm armed and ready.

What puzzles me is, with today's technology and common practices, how is it possible I still get behind old people in the Express Lane with 15 items??? It's not a huge deal, I know. And in the world of not making assumptions, how do I know that they didn't think the 10 was a 15? And maybe it's because I'm standing in line juggling 9 items (because I inevitably believe I'm just getting a couple things).

But, seriously people?? Could we maybe say something when the person walks up with obviously a full cart and stop it then? Do these people believe that 10 of one item actually counts??

I don't remember a specific episode of Seinfeld addressing this dilemma, but have decided it might be worth the research. If I ask myself what they would do, I think I know the answer:

**George - He would take a bite out of the old person's food to hurry it along

**Kramer - He would threaten to sue the store for the cramp he got in his arm trying to hold a gallon of milk with his pinky

**Elaine - She would eventually end up in some sort of fist fight with the old lady, ultimately losing and getting escorted from the store.

**And Jerry? - He would roll his eyes, and wait until his next stand up routine, or until we got home to vent to his friends.

I miss that show about "Nothing". Oh how it makes me appreciate the "Nothing" that irritates me so.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

My Twin is Better than YOURS

The fact that I only have one child causes me some anxiety sometimes. I never planned it this way. I always assumed after I got married, I'd see how the other half of the Mom's tried it. I was going to see what it was like to have a child WITH my husband. Alas (...sigh...) the health issues (previously mentioned in my other posts) determined that for me, and one is what I get.

When my son was in kindergarten, I was always so afraid for him. He rode the bus by himself, rode his bike in the court by himself (of course I watched, CPS back off), heck he would do so much by himself, or on his own, I am just amazed by his bravery. Knowing he would be an only child, although he seems perfectly fine with it, broke my heart and it took me quite a while to understand why. I never had to do anything by myself!

You see, I am 1/2 of a pretty well balanced twin team. My twin sister is truly my best friend. She is the Yin to my Yang. People always ask, "You mean there's another one just like you out there?" Heck no!! That would be absolutely crazy. You might say we are the same person, in a parallel universe (you Star Trek fans know what I mean).

I like to describe us as:
She's right handed and I am left.
She's got naturally straight hair, whereas mine is fresh from the electrical outlet.
She has brown eyes and I have blue.
She's good at Math & Science, where my interests have always been more Arts & History.
She's a bit more on the reserve side, where I'm kinda out there. (Not a professional diagnosis however).
She's tall and thin...Um...Okay, maybe we do have a lot in common (NOT)!!

We were pretty sure the Wonder Twins had NOTHING on us. Put us on a game show and we would bring home the prizes for sure!!

We're often asked, "What's it like being a twin?" To that, my answer is always "What's it like not being a twin?" I don't know how to be anything else. I have never had to do the whole alone thing. Obviously we had our own interests and did different things from time to time, but I have always had her to lean on. I have no idea where I would be, were it not for her, and I am constantly thankful for that.

There was a well known rule between my twin and I while growing up. If I asked permission from our folks, to do anything, the answer would always be "No!". However, if my sister asked the same darned question, it would inevitably be "Yes!" Oh how she would use that one over me. It was never known why at the time, but I used to do everything...short of physical harm (again, trying to keep CPS off my back) get her to ask for permission. We later asked Mom why this would be...and she simply said, "We always trusted her judgment more than yours". DUH!!! Of course you did!! I know I would!!

Now we are both grown up, with families of our own (who knew she'd end up with 3 boys) and yet we still talk every day! She lives a couple hours away, but we do try to see each other as often as we can. She has seen me through some very "interesting" (insert any appropriate adjective here) times. Maybe there was something to Mom's idea of judgment? Hmmmm.... Ever since that movie Beaches, my Mom has always she sees those girls as us. I guess to some cheesy/corny degree she is right. She IS "the wind beneath my wings".

My hope? That I'm not the hole in her hot air balloon.

One of the best things about my sister? And another thing we don't have really in common, but a good quality I strive to have?? Her ability to NOT take things personally. She doesn't care much about what other people think. She lets things roll off her back pretty well, and amazes me every day. I only wish I had that quality. I'm getting better as I get older, but she stays 3 steps ahead of me.

When I grow up, I want to be like my sister!!

Thanks Cara!! You ROCK!!!

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Attack of the YABUTS

Dear Mary,

I write you this letter in the third person so that I might be able to get your advice on something. You see, I find myself in this predicament that I think only you can help me with.

You see, I have this "friend" (her name also coincidentally is Mary). Mary is typically a fun-loving person, gets along with most people, and tends to make people laugh. I have only witnessed Mary lose her temper on a rare occasion when her tourette's syndrome is triggered and she begins swearing like a sailor (unable to use trucker as Mary's husband is a trucker and she swears worse than him on occasion). That being said, even when Mary is in one of those moods, it usually passes pretty quickly and she ends up making fun of it and still making people laugh.

Recently though, I've been concerned about me, I mean my "friend". She has now developed a "stink eye" tick. You know the look...I think I've seen it in The Pink Panther movies, the one where something bothers the inspector and he closes one eye half way. I don't remember this problem being there before, and it's really only triggered on certain occasions. What triggers it?? I fear even discussing it will instigate the problem, but for the good of my "friend", I will tell you.

My "friend" is Diabetic, like yourself. She has to regulate it with multiple shots of significant amounts of insulin every day. Mary wishes she could be a candidate for the pump, but alas, her body requires the injection of too much insulin per day which disqualifies her as a candidate. She does try to take care of herself, but recently her diabetes has not been behaving well and too much stress has taken its toll on Mary. It is not this condition, although quite frustrating, that is triggering Mary's current "stink eye", however.

I have noticed, the "stink eye" is triggered by hearing anything from the YABUT people. Mary says anyone can be a YABUT person without even knowing it. It's really quite terrifying when she realizes a loved one has succumbed to the YABUT and become one of them. The YABUT's are very crafty in their disguises, but just when you least expect it, they begin to tell you how come Mary's diabetes is out of control, and what she needs to do to take care of it. They say things like:
- Yeah but you know that all you need to do is:
a) Stop eating sugar
b) Exercise 2 + hours a day
c) Eat more salads
d) Not eat after 7pm
.....and the list goes on.

It's amazing to learn how many of these YABUT people there are. I didn't believe it myself until Mary pointed them out to me. They aren't doctors, they aren't dietitians, and to the best of my knowledge, none of them are diabetics!!!

There are two kinds of YABUTS, the LFF YABUTS and the PITA YABUTS. The LFF are "Loving Family & Friend" YABUTS. They are very close to Mary, and Mary understands that they are only concerned for her well being because they love her and want her to be ok. The PITA are basically the "Pain In The A$$" YABUTS. Those are people who happen to overhear a discussion, know nothing about Mary as a person, and inject their YABUT poison.

What apparently has happened is Mary's filter to determine the difference between the LFF and the PITA has been clogged. She now gets this "stink eye" with all YABUTS. She doesn't want to, but she does. The "stink eye" is starting to offend the LFF YABUTS and she fears they are going to take it personally. She doesn't know how to explain that this is a physical reaction she has no control over. Unfortunately, the same "stink eye" is not fazing the PITA YABUTS one bit, which is part of what makes them PITA's.

Can you help? Do you have any ideas?? How does Mary make the LFF's understand that she appreciates their concern and loves them for it? I (SHE) wants the LFF's to see past the "stink eye" and know that Mary is getting their LFF YABUT message, and is trying. We don't need any commentary on how to handle the PITA's, because they are so self absorbed they don't even know they are PITA's.

Please feel free to share any thoughts you might have!! I implore you!!

Your Cybill "Friend",

Friday, October 12, 2007

Overcoming my commitment issues

Just last night I was marvelling at the fact that I've officially been blogging a little over a week. Now I am afraid I may have gotten a bit too big for my britches (and I don't mean in the weight arena people...but ok that too).

I can't believe I am about to do this, but I have joined NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month). What is this you ask? It's a commitment to post a blog every day for 30 days. The entire month of November. No weekends or holidays off either!! (Yikes, what's a girl to do when gone for Thanksgiving on our annual trip to the desert?) I can't believe it!! I took my cue from the bold dee/otc. She's very new at this too and already off to a great start. She challenged me to do this, so here I am.

Many of you don't realize I have commitment issues. Ask my husband!! (kidding honey) But really, I have a hard time committing to what I will be able to do over the weekend, or next week, much less for 30 days. If nothing else, it will be a test of my perseverance. I made a commitment to myself to make things different, and this is part of it.

My mind is racing with all sorts of different ideas, then I hello? I still have two weeks to get there. Does this mean I'm going to abandon my site? No way!! There will be all sorts of postings. I'm going to try and post my blogs both here, and there (if I can figure out how). For any fellow bloggers, you can catch it at and see how it goes. Either way, you'll be along for the journey...right?...Or not?? ;)

Well, I don't think I'll have to worry about what to write about. Since my blog is about me, my stories, what I witness, I should be alright since I'm writing it (she says while practicing her positive thinking skills). I'm nervous as heck because I think this means more people will be reading ME. Oh well, I can only re-read my posts so many times. :)

Until next time...Hang in and HANG ON!!

Thursday, October 11, 2007

A Week Already???

It's official, I have officially been blogging for a week!! Well, technically a week expired yesterday, but had "issues" yesterday and wasn't able to get online to celebrate. So here I am...WOOHOO!!! (This is where you imagine the noisemakers and the confetti without the noise and the cleanup, could it be any cooler?)

So, what have I learned in a week of blogging?? LOTS!!! I have learned about some things I shouldn't do, thanks to pros like Amy Derby (hoping I linked to her site correctly, and that it's ok to do so). She is this wonderfully witty writer, who's blog I am grateful to have found.

Also, I've stumbled across a couple of other blogs I can't believe I've located. Remember, when I started this I had to google my own blogspot? The fact that I have been able to relocate others' sites has been nothing short of a miraculous feat for me. And how wonderful so many of them are!! Thank you, Dawnelle and dee/otc!! You both have such unique sites, that I truly am enjoying what you both offer. AND...did anyone notice I learned how to insert a picture on the last one?? Wait...there's no comments on the last one...did anyone read my last post?? Apparently there's a way to monitor the traffic on the site, that will have to be my next project...after getting the links and my pictures down.

I've been telling people about my new hobby, and it's interesting to see their reactions. Many people aren't quite sure what it is when I tell them. Let's face it, until I stumbled on my friend's site a couple weeks back, I didn't either. But I tell them, "I've started a BLOG" and the looks have ranged from "what is that?" to "why would you do that?", or "huh?". (Really, there is a difference between those looks. I could show you, but again, haven't mastered the picture thing.)

I don't blame them really. I started this blog because I thought it might be a nice, creative outlet for me. Sort of a journal online. Obviously it's not necessarily a secret one, because it is online, but it is still a bit of an outlet. So, should I expect people to understand why it might be fun to go online and write short little articles on my life? Not really, but do I hope that they find the stories entertaining nonetheless? You BET!!

It's amazing how you can write down your thoughts and other people share feedback about how they can relate, and what their experience was. I have spent hours reading about other people this week. I'm not reading about the latest stupid Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, or Lindsay Lohan story because let's face it...WHO CARES?? I'm reading about real people!! Wonderfully crazy, witty, wacky, lovely people!!!

People are wildly entertaining, and I am a HUGE fan of watching people. I like to sit at the mall, or at the airport, and just watch people as they walk by and relate to eachother. Now that I've started blogging, and reading others' blogs, I get to do that the comfort of my office...and without having to take my shoes off at security (although I can take my shoes off if I want to).

So, as I salute myself for completing a full week at my new hobby (cheers to me) I look forward to how these early blogs might be used as a learning curve or stepping stone to only better blogs. It only gets better from here folks!!!

Thank you so much for sharing this new journey with me!

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Easy for you to say

I love, and it's the other resources linked to it like thesaurus, encyclopedia, etc. I typically use it whenever I want to make sure I'm using a word properly, or want to learn the true meaning of a word. We often think we understand what a word means, but do we really??

For example:
re·lax Pronunciation[ri-laks] Pronunciation Key
–verb (used with object)
1. to make less tense, rigid, or firm; make lax: to relax the muscles.
2. to diminish the force of.
3. to slacken or abate, as effort, attention, etc.
4. to make less strict or severe, as rules, discipline, etc.: to relax the requirements for a license.
5. to release or bring relief from the effects of tension, anxiety, etc.: A short swim always relaxes me.

–verb (used without object)
6. to become less tense, rigid, or firm.
7. to become less strict or severe; grow milder.
8. to reduce or stop work, effort, application, etc., esp. for the sake of rest or recreation.
9. to release oneself from inhibition, worry, tension, etc.

Okay, that seems to be an easy enough word to understand. Only about nine different possibilities as to what it can mean. It seems to be one of those verbs that should have a universal understanding like walk, look, eat, etc. However, is it really something that we modern day Americans can actually do? Is it possible that the ability to relax must be a learned trait, and is not automatically ingrained in us for survival sake? We all know how important it is to have a good "life balance" if we can relax. So, why is it so difficult for some of us to do?

Well, if you are one of those people that can deeply drop into meditation with the flip of a coin, have no problem with that "walking the dog" yoga move, or you feel completely rested and stress does not effect you at all, some people might tell you to stop reading here. PLEASE DON'T!! Why would I want that if you have something you might be able to share and help the rest of us "relaxation challenged" individuals??

I am currently on a MIS (Medically Induced Sabbatical), which is just my fancy words for, "the doctor is afraid I'm going to POP so he's put me on disability" statement. I have some health issues that apparently don't react well with stress. Some people are allergic to peanuts...I've got this stress thing. Who knew?

So, what can I do to help my health issues? RELAX!! My medications can only help so far, from what the doctor says. It's like my body is actually resisting the medications. Huh?? I'm told that until I learn how to deal with stress, learn to focus on me, learn to take care of the ever-important me and RELAX, it's not going to get better any time soon.

Relax...hmmmm...I understand the meaning of the word, I've already showed you that. But how do I actually apply the word? I thought I had been:
- I currently commute over 40 miles, each way, per day (when I'm working), but I had taken on a carpooler to ease in the driving.
- When working, it is nothing for me to put in LONG hours in the day, but now that I have the carpooler we were both working on making our days shorter for our families.
- I'm very involved with the three "S's" (Scouting, School and Sports), but I had even tried scaling back on some committments.

Whatever I had been trying, hadn't yet made a difference. So, here I sit, being told to "go home and relax". Easy for you to say!! It's one thing when you have planned a glorious vacation to Hawaii and can relax for a week. However, when you have doctors saying you can't go back to your job until you figure out how to relax, well the pressure is on. I don't know about you, but my body is inclined to do exactly the opposite.

What have I done since I've been off?
- I've joined a gym AND Jazzercize, which is actually more fun than I expected. I never had time for it before.
- I'm trying to read a little every night.
- I've gotten to make my son's football practices, even though he broke his arm shortly after my MIS started.
- I'm trying to listen to my body, and rest when it calls for it.
- I'm seeing my "treaters" regularly.
- I'm getting a massage.
- And I'm re-discovering what used to be very important to me...writing.

Is this relaxing? Am I doing it right? Would I be asked to leave a group of "Overachievers Anonymous" for not getting the point of slowing down and trying to over-achieve?

All I can say is, I'm trying. I'll keep you posted on my progress...if any.

Monday, October 8, 2007

You bought WHAT??

Disclaimer: What you are about to read should in no way be misconstrued as a negative reflection of what otherwise appears to be a perfect marriage, made in heaven, for all eternity, blah...blah...blah...Ok, now that we have the disclaimers out of the way (automatically recognizing I deal with these in my "day job") let's talk turkey.

My husband is a buy-a-holic!! Alright, I know that it may not be an actual word, but I'm always of the personal opinion that if you hyphenate the word, it becomes do-able. See how well that works?? Oops, I digress.

The American Heritage Dictionary defines shopaholic as, "A person who shops compulsively or very frequently". My husband doesn't stop at that, see that might allude to someone merely looking to buy items. See, there's all sorts of "shopping"...there's window shopping, impulse shopping, Christmas shopping, etc. However, when you "buy", there's only one true meaning to that...the money's spent.

After over 8 years together, my husband (insert "bless his heart" comment here) still hasn't figured out that it might not be safe to bring a newly acquired vehicle to the house without my permission. Although I say permission, what I really mean is, over my dead body.

I'm not a controlling person, by any stretch of the imagination. However, we currently insure a motorcycle, a jeep, another jeep, a pickup, a beetle (that one's mine), a couple dirt bikes, a couple ATV's, a fishing boat and a toy trailer. We even have a darned golf cart, it doesn't run of course, but it's still in our yard. I should explain that not a single one of these vehicles is "new". Only two of the autos are in this decade, all the rest are 80's or earlier.

When I came home the other night, to a Blazer in my driveway, I did what any considerate wife would do, pulled into the pull through driveway so his friend, the owner of the Blazer, could back out without a problem. Well, my honey said that wouldn't be a problem, "It's ours!" he said proudly (feeling the need to insert another "bless his heart"). Yep, we are currently the proud owners of a 1989 Chevy Blazer. WooHoo!!! (really trying to emphasize my enthusiasm, are you feeling it?)

The difference with this vehicle, and all the others, is that my honey actually discussed this one with me. We talked about it, he said he wanted to get it so he can work on one of the jeeps for our son to learn on and drive. How touching, I thought to myself, he's concerned with teaching my boy how to work on a car so he knows how and can use it when he learns to drive. Who could resist such father/son bonding? What kind of mother would that make me?

Hmmmmmmmmm...but our son is only 11, I'm currently experiencing what I refer to as a "medically induced sabbatical" and because we currently have FIVE road worthy vehicles and TWO people legal to drive them, I didn't think it was such a good idea this time. However, I gave him props, kudos and a big hug for actually discussing this with me. I felt so good, like we've truly grown in our level of communication. You don't know this, but this was a huge step for him.

So, how did we move from this deep level of communication to me dropping my groceries on the front lawn out of sheer shock? Easy, he's a compulsive buy-a-holic. He made all the claims of, "I don't remember you telling me no" to "But when it snows you'll have 4-wheel drive again", "I got it for a really good deal" and even tried the, "Can I get you something to drink?"

What could I say? Take it back? Sell something else? You're on glue? Ok, I've used the glue comment in other, more appropriate times, but couldn't apply it here. The truth is, my husband is a great guy, with a good heart. He works real hard as a truck driver, and he is great with my son..."our" son. Six months after we were married, he adopted my son, and has never treated him any differently.

Does he exercise poor judgement? Sure, but who doesn't?
Could he have picked a better time? You bet!!
Will he do this again?? Survey says...Of coarse!!! Bless his heart!!!

Friday, October 5, 2007

Temporary Coolness

As the mother of a middle schooler, I find myself faced with the quandary I'm not sure my parents thought about when I was in jr. high. Will I effect my child's "coolness"?

I think my parents, as most parents do, took great joy in doing things that they knew would intentionally embarrass us as children. I now have friends that I know still derive great pleasure in knowing it is "their turn" to humiliate their kids. I guess it's some sort of right of passage, so to speak.

I try to be very mindful of what could be misconstrued as "not cool". Not that my child has to have the best of everything, because let's face it, who can afford that? But middle school is TOUGH!! This school is 5th through 8th grade, and he's in 6th. I know it's important that he be allowed to make his own way, in order for him to grow. However, kids can be cruel (I know I would NOT want to live middle school, or jr. high, again) and my son doesn't need me contributing to any detriment in his character.

So, as I try to let my only child grow and find his way, I find myself torn between wanting to smother him with love, and give him all the space he needs. If he's to be determined "cool" or "uncool", it's not going to be because of something I did. Every parent wants their child to feel confident, whether they fit in or not.

At the same time, as the kids try to learn who they are, I know they can be hurtful and sassy in their comments and attitudes. Heck, it's amazing my eyes didn't stick in the back of my head as much as I rolled them as a teenager. My son's shield of rebellion, for the sake of rebellion, has yet to reveal it's true shade but maybe if we tackle it a little along the way, it won't be as painful as what some parents experience.

Well, let me tell you about a GLORIOUS moment that happened to me tonight. My son has a friend having a sleep over, and we're on our way to the house, Son, Me & Friend. We are all rocking out to Nickelback, together. We're singing the songs and dancing in the car together. of the coolest things ever said to me by my son happened:

(end of Rockstar song)
Me: Ok guys, this was just a very cool moment for me.
Ty: Why?
Me: Because all three of us were rocking out and singing the same song, TOGETHER! This is very cool. I know the words to one of YOUR songs. I think this just made me kinda cool for just this moment.
Ty: (after a short pause, looks at me and places his hand on mine) You're always kinda cool, Mom.

OMG!!! I almost stopped the car immediately!!!!!!!!!!! Ok...keeping my composure even as I type. It played in my mind over and over, and five minutes later (because it takes us 20 minutes to get to our house from anywhere) I turned to him and said, "I'm pretty sure this is going to be one of those moments I keep with me forever. That was about the sweetest thing you've said in a long time, and I thank you."

I was so excited, I couldn't wait to get home and immortalize the comment. I realize that, like a letter to my boy, he could some day read this and truly understand the power of his statement. Don't get my son is no perfect angel. But I'm going to relish this moment, and now I have it in writing, to remind me not to kill him later when he forgets to clean the cat litter or hides dirty socks in his gear bag. I am SO LUCKY!!

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Is there a "System"?

Hi! Me again...

I know I said that this blog was going to be about assumptions made, and learning about myself. Well, I guess I should insert the disclaimer that while I travel through this etherial adventure in looking at everyone's insight, trying to keep an open mind, and not make assumptions, it should be noted that I am going to digress, get frustrated, make these same assumptions, and want to scream!! Let's face it...I'm not perfect...are you??

I have been doing further research on different blogs, seeing what works for all these brave souls out there sharing their thoughts and emotions for all the world to see. Some of them are so calming and refreshing. Their photos, their posts, everything about their site simply promotes tranquility and peace. I found one that just quoted different meditation techniques. Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....I thought to myself. How nice it must be to maintain existence on that level.

Self...get with the program!! You need to be more like these people, offer some thought provoking witicisms, challenge anyone to look inside themselves, medicate (oops) I mean "meditate" as often as humanly possible. Really? Seriously?? Do you really need another one of these??

Then I have found some other really fun blogs. Their topics are all over the place, but SO very fun. I think that could be more my speed. Except, some of those sites have so many days in them. You know the days I refer to: "joke of the day", "word of the day", "gay insight of the day", "pet peeve of the day", "dog food of the day", "hangnail of the day". I'm not sure I could handle the daily pressure. Is there a tab for "got nothin' for the day"? What if I couldn't keep up with my day? WOW...then I couldn't log in for a day? Or two? Oh I give up!!

So, is there a "system" to this blogging that I'm supposed to follow? Ya know...I'm going to try and make this my journal. What cracks me up? What makes me smile? What irks the heck outta me? I guess it depends on the day (crap, did I really just insert another "day"?). This is a new hobby for me, and I'm really excited about it. But let's face it, it will probably be for my eyes only anyway.

I encourage anyone to add comments, if you happen to find this page. :) I think I had to google my own darn blog! I guess I need to start with the basics, huh??

Have a great "day"!

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Here Goes Nothing...

Welcome to my page!! If you found my're a lot better than I am at this stuff!!

I've made a commitment to myself to learn more about me, and what better way to learn about me than through expression of my thoughts, and the reflection of the thoughts of others. I've been reading others' blogs for some time, and think I am beginning to get the hang of this. Where I lack skills and abilities, I'm sure someone will point me in the right direction.

The whole purpose of my blog title is merely a reflection of how people, places and things (not intentionally trying to define a noun) can appear to be one way, and depending on one's interpretation, can be or mean something completely different to everyone. It's all about perception.

You might see a "thin" person joining a weight loss clinic, and then very large people wearing clothes that might not fit right. A very sweet woman changed my whole perspective on the latter of the two examples, "How do we know that this person hasn't just lost 100 lbs and feels absolutely phenomenal about themselves??" Answer: We don't!

Then you have a typically healthy individual taking two weeks off, for what appears to be a head cold, and someone with significant health issues, pushing themselves back to work the day after they're sent to the emergency room. Which is the better employee??

The world is made up of people who make assumptions about others. I know I've been guilty of it...we all have. Let's use the "shoe on the other foot" mentality and try to discover a little something about ourselves in the process. I know I'm trying!!