Tuesday, January 6, 2009

What You Find When You Clean Your Desk

Today Grandy had to pack up her work desk and move....2 desks away.

There are some advantages to moving just 2-flippin'-desks away. Really. Although I can't really think of any at the moment, there must be some.

Oh yeah! You need not pack things in boxes. That's a plus, right? No...wait...instead you make a gazillion trips between the two. Suck.

It is always interesting the things you find when you have to relocate. I hadn't even thought it would be that much stuff because we only moved into the office a year ago. Well, let me tell you...I was irritated as all get out shocked and dismayed at what I found.

You see, Grandy is "paperless" at work. What does that mean? She is to work WITHOUT PAPER! I fought it along the way, but truly, it is a wonderful thing. Apparantly, I have a paper-crack addiction and didn't even know it AND my co-workers are my suppliers that should be ashamed for contributing to my habit.

When I get mail (and boy do I get mail) it is scanned to my email for me to process. Apparantly, that is not enough. They also deliver the hard copy to my desk. Then, when mail is misrouted to everyone in the office, that mail is also delivered to me (not scanned) whenever that person decides to look at it and gets around to giving it to me. It's not the most "efficient" system... but we are trying.

I've gotten so good that I maybe now send one actual physical letter per month. If I have to send anything, I print it to PDF and email it. Watch out for Grandy...she might sound almost organized.

So...here's what Grandy found when cleaning out her desk (did I mention to move 2 desks away?). Remember the key word here people...paperless.

- 2 Flashlights - I didn't even know I had 1
- 12 Note Pads - Really? Why? I am quite certain I could not have strategically placed all those.
- 62 pens - Only 2 of them worked
- 2 Catchup Packets - Hey, those are important when they hose you at the drive-thru.
- 1 Tape Dispenser - No tape...just the dispenser.
- 1 Date Stamp with my name on it - Last date stamped... 06-11-2007
- 1 FAT A$$ Binder, full of records sent by a client (already scanned) - Technically, this was strategically placed on my desk after I had told that person to shred them.
- 33 pieces of mail - So much for being paperless **Special note: I have no idea which mail has been scanned to me, and which has not.
- 16 Rubber bands - Must work on that rubber band ball sometime.
- 8 push pins - those are strategically placed to hold up my jokes
- 1 Dr. Suess Poem - Every desk MUST have one
- 267 Binder Clips - UGH!!! I need to find another use for these.
- 192,768 PAPER CLIPS - For all that paper...right?

Well, Grandy is going to go make herself a nice long noose with all thos paper clips, put 16 small braids through her hair, and strategically place 267 binder clips as a boobie trap for the person who keeps eating my cheese.


Deanna said...

You can eliminate the clutter caused by the push pins - your jokes stand on their own. ;-)

Congrats on your new...desk!

storyteller said...

Oh my gosh ... the list of what I might find would be scary indeed! I do love Dr. Seuss ... and this poem is a favorite of mine ;--)
Hugs and blessings,

songbird's crazy world said...

you're scaring me, grandy. not only because I dread to think what might be in the bottom drawer of my desk...but because we're going paperless in about a year or so.

Jibber Jabber said...

I love that Dr. Seuss poem. Hopefully the move to the new desk wasn't too taxing on you.

The Hawg! said...

I had to clean out my desk recently as we're moving to a new, improved office (i.e., one that's even more corporate and horrible than the one we're in now -- a place of piercing florescent lights and cubicles -- the kind of place that hell must be like).

At any rate, I didn't have much to find as I tend to simply go through things every couple of months and throw out just about everything that's not nailed down.

I did discover that someone wandered into my office and swiped my stapler, however.


LadyJava said...

I hate moving.. PERIOD..hehe..but sometimes it's great coz you find stuff that you think you lost..hehe.. then that's awesome!!

Hope you connection prob is ok now dearie!!

Jen said...

At my last "real" job I felt like Milton. Constantly getting moved around for no real reason. I didn't actually do anything at the company, no one did, so moving was a way to make us think we were productive. This is why I can't work in the cube environment. Aside from the fact that I don't work well with others. Good luck on the move and get that rubber band ball started...hours of amusement.

Grandy said...

Deanna~ Thanks girl.

Storyteller~ You strike me as one who would appreciate the good ol' Dr. Suess. ;)

Songbird~ That's saying alot in your legal world. It can be done. IT CAN!

Jibber Jabber~ NAAAAHHHHHH!!!

Grandy said...

Hawg~ Not the stapler!! Those bastards! Have you seen Office Space?

LJ~ It did get better, but not until much later.

Jen~ It was truly therapy when my Dad died. Literally. I spent hours making a huge one because he collected rubber bands. I ultimately buried it with him.

Why did I write all that just now? Sorry...

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

At least you get to start the new year with a clean desk.

Grandy said...

Jenn~ Very true. :)

Mrs. F said...

Oh my! What a great poem! I love, love, love it!!!!!

Grandy said...

I recite the first phrase daily, Paloma. :)