Friday, July 31, 2009
Over the last several weeks I have witnessed her care from her mother, who until yesterday was in her final stages of cancer. My friend would be with her mother at night, and try to work from her mother's home during the day.
When "Mom's" condition worsened a few weeks ago, my immediate reaction was pretty much like this: "Okay...here's what you can expect. You are one of six grown children. Your family will all react differently. They will act crazy...and so will you." Let's face it folks, everyone copes with things differently, and just because you're related it doesn't mean they will react as you would.
At first, I worried that my initial advice was too harsh. Maybe her family wouldn't get crazy... but I did feel pretty confident that with 6 grown children, all married, there were way too many family dynamics coming into play. It's a good thing we joked about it, because as we entered into our third week of her adventure, the pressure was starting to mount and reactions were more extreme.
Last week I got a text message from her that read, Remind me again why I can't kill my family? To which I replied with a simple...Because the "Twinkie defense" only works if you actually EAT twinkies, which you don't. She sent me a couple messages after that... LOL...and significantly later...STILL LOL!
My blessing at work regrettably joined the "LOP" (Loss of Parent) club yesterday. Her lovely mother was only 71. How beautiful that she got to be with her, in her final moments. It's even more wonderful that she feels honored by it. Deep down...I know she will be okay, but right now it doesn't help the hurt.
It doesn't matter how old your parent is. The LOP club SUCKS!!!
The only comfort I could give her when she showed up at the office today (oh yes she did folks...don't worry...I kicked her out as soon as she would let me) was that I was here in this club to be there for her. I can't promise to take her pain away, but I can take her under my wing in the club, as some wonderful people did for me.
If you are a member of the LOP club...bless you. If you are not...bless you too. If this circle of life crap happens as I'm told it's supposed to, you will be. It sucks...but you're not alone. Come into the club only when you're ready...and one of the existing members (like me) will be there to embrace you.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
One definition appears to be - VOLUNTARY: Before we make it Mandatory.
Grandy definitely feels like this dog, swimming, while the world around her says, "stand up idiot!"
Thursday, July 23, 2009
This is what was happening when she called me. Because Grandy was not in the area, she had no idea of the magnitude. This thing burned through about 600 acres in a very short time, but the fire crews (as they always are) were AWESOME!!
Grandy was able to come home, but it was late and the area seemed eerily like driving straight into the depths of purgatory. The sky was completely red, the flames were huge, there were little fires along the side of the road, where the firefighters had tried to light fires to keep it back. I've got to admit, I was a little nervous driving on the road at 10:30 at night, with flames nearby, with her convertible.
NEVER a dull moment in Grandy-land. NEVER!!!!
Grandy obviously made it home, completely in awe of how quickly things can happen. It got her thinking... If Grandy was in one of those mass distruction videos where the volcano erupts, a meteor is crashing into the earth, or we were invaded by aliens...would Grandy be one that survives?
Now, if she were on the Titanic, she wouldn't have survived. She would have been down below with the real people, partying it up and dancing on the tables. She'd be giving the bird to the folks that locked us down there.
But as far as surviving these sort of things... probably... but not without several injuries along the way. THAT is the story of my life.
*SURVIVAL WITH INJURIES*
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Grandy thought that Tuesday was a better day than yesterday's Grumpy Grumperton from Grumpville day. REALLY.
However...this serenity prayer pretty much sums up the frustration and hostility she can't quite keep a handle on.
Can you read it? It is not intended to mock the actual serenity prayer (Grandy actually relies on that on a regular basis) but it does work for Grandy right now.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I cannot accept,
and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I had to kill today because they pissed me off.
Where do I sign for this mantra??
Monday, July 20, 2009
FOLLOW YOUR GUT GRANDY!!
Well in classic Grandy style, rather than sit here and mope about her day, she has decided to come online and
Clue 1: When carpool friend asks you, as you're walking to her car, "What's the matter with you today Grumpy Grumperton from Grumpville?" - Was it THAT obvious?
Clue 2: Ladies...when you use the toilet seat protector in the restroom, Grandy is pretty certain that if you didn't want to plant your ass on the seat, we don't want to plant OURS on your seat protector. Here's a hint...flush it WITH your stuff. - Normally things like that don't bug Grandy.
Clue 3: Nasty Man calls weekly to yell at Grandy. TODAY...Grandy hung up on Nasty Man. - Oh yes she did!
Clue 4: One of the owners sends a special invitation to 9 people in the company for a special event on his boat. Grandy realizes she is the ONLY female in the group, and her first thought is not one of appreciation, but an image of Grandy entering into the lion's den.
Clue 5: Grandy is having a discussion with an attorney representing a
Clue 6: Grandy had 6.3 people ask her if she was alright today. - Seriously? I tried to keep to myself and mind my own. Is that where I went wrong?
Yep! Grandy was in a bit of foul mood indeed.
Oh well. At least she can laugh about it...tomorrow.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
This call was different.
"Grandy, we have someone wanting to do a feature for the Sutter Health Website, and we'd like to relay your information on. Would you be interested?"
Huh? Sure...I suppose.
A month goes by. The call comes from the hospital asking me to sign some documents. Perhaps they want to determine their varying levels of "success", and need to see if Grandy qualifies.
Another month goes by and the call comes from the writer doing the feature.
As she's asking me questions, I'm still a bit amazed that people want to talk to ME about being a "success" where it comes to my health. ME?!? SERIOUSLY?
Folks...the article is up. When I sent the link out to my family and friends it made me cry like a baby. The thought of the words "success" and "health" being used in the same breath, and have them talk about ME meant more than you will ever know. I have only touched the surface on my health issues here on this blog, but it is safe to know I have been through a journey.
Please go read my article here: http://checksutterfirst.org/bariatrics/patientstories/mary.html
Come back and comment, and enjoy the article. It makes me cry just thinking about it. I need to use it as my reminder to be strong, even when I feel like I cannot.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
It took a lot of work to coordinate the trip for 17 boys and 5 leaders but the Grandy boys, and the most of the troop, pulled away this morning without a hitch. I'm certain that the boys will have fun, both young and old. The Dads going are a great group. The boys will come home with some great stories, new merit badges, and a very distinctive odor emitting from them that will take another week to get it out.
So what does this mean?
GRANDY HAS THE HOUSE TO HERSELF FOR A WEEK!!!!
Here is my very own honey-do list for the week. I've never done my own, surrounded mostly on what I WANT...so it's kind of fun.
*Take a nap - will do that when I'm done here.
*Read a book - yep! Started one yesterday, and my goal is to finish it this week.
*Dishes - Not a biggie...I do that anyway. NOW I can do it with my Broadway Channel blaring in the background.
*Work - Didn't take any days off but I've got meetings, and one of them involves a boat trip in San Francisco one day.
*Post Daily Here - It's been a while, and I'm having difficulty with the scheduling feature, but I can do this for a week!!
*See Altar Boyz Thursday - It's a musical I'm not familiar with, but the reviews are pretty good. Going with a friend, and any night where I can get Sushi and a Musical is a great night.
*Go to Lake Tahoe Friday - Going with another friend to catch Shakespeare at Tahoe. Oh yes, a good girlfriend (she's been trying to get me to go every summer for 6 years), Lake Tahoe, good wine, and my boy Bill. It rarely gets much better.
Not a bad week, huh?
It's sad that I try to squeeze in my first loves (theatre, music, reading, writing) while my other loves are away. It just kinda works out this way. My time is not my own when the boys are around. I need to work on that balance.
This might be JUST what Grandy needs.
See you all on the other side of a week of Rest and Relaxation!!!
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Saturday, July 4, 2009
At any given time we have one, several, or all of these boys with us.
They're a group of knuckleheads, but I gotta love them.
I was so proud of them this morning at the 4th of July parade.
I hope you all have a glorious holiday weekend!!