As Grandy was racing down the hill on Saturday last week, she thought to herself...
30 Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwhiches made, all the scouts and leaders are fed - Check
Laundry has been transferred - Check
Took care of man who cut his leg with the chain saw - Check (seriously...I had 30 scouts and leaders in my dang back yard and I'M the one taking care of the chain saw injury because the Dad didn't want anyone "to know".)
Did Grandy get her house cleaned? - NO Check
Grandy was now racing to a 1:00 baby shower, an hour away, and then a 5:00 bridal shower also an hour away. (For the record, they were two different people and yes, they were about 15 minutes from each other at least.)
BUT Grandy's house is NOT clean. It's anything but! UGH!! A nap is on the schedule on or about January 13, 2010...when will Grandy get a chance to CLEAN?
The thought crossed my mind that perhaps I'm just not built to be domestically inclined. There are those people...maybe I'm just one of them. Grandy tries to keep it all together, but can only keep up the appearance for so long. If any of those scouts had to actually come into the house, I'm pretty certain it would give Ty a nickname that would carry him through high school.
That night I was instructed to meet the boys at a friend's house who is having a "get together", I dutifully arrived at around 9:00. My girlfriends were obviously well ahead of me in their quest to escape all reality and get their drink on, and I decided I wasn't going to try to catch up (shocking I know). Hey...Grandy can still get her party on, and have a good time, without alcohol.
The conversation took an interesting turn when one girlfriend started talking about how hard she works to be perfect for her husband and family. WTF? Perfect?!
I asked her to define what her take on perfection was, and she was able to tell me quicker than blinking. One of the keys to her perfection was a clean house. Not just a "clean" house, but an uber-no-dirt-to-be-found-cans lined in a row-everything in its place-clean.
THEN I asked her to define what her husband thought perfection was... blink... blink. A clean house.
She asked me how I do it all, and I laughed and rolled my eyes. I don't do it ALL. I do a lot, and fake the rest. She says, "NO!! You are amazing with all the stuff you do, and do well." Now, this woman has seen the inside of my house, maybe it was a while ago, but she's been inside. It is nowhere near perfection. Doesn't she know that?
This woman carried on (and I do love this woman) with talking about all the committees I'm on, and run, all the events I do, the hours of work I put in, and how hard the work is. Bless her heart, she actually said that she wants to BE LIKE GRANDY. *Put the crack pipe down and no one gets hurt* Seriously?
On a day where Grandy is questioning whether she is doing enough, and wonders how she can even do what she's doing, and someone is praising her? Someone with an immaculately clean house? Huh??
One thing my friend struggles with is how to relate to her husband. I told her she needed to sit down and ask him what he thought perfection was. If she's working so hard to be perfect, based on what she thinks is perfect and doesn't know anymore what he wants, then what's the point? All her efforts are being lost for the wrong reasons. With that, when I dropped her off, she hugged me and skipped off to her house.
"You are a wise and good soul Grandy." she called out. (she truly does call me Grandy)
It just goes to show you...just when you feel like you are at your weakest, and not fooling anyone. Someone comes along to remind you that you're doing something right... even if you can't see my dining room table.