Sunday, September 14, 2008


He was 17.
Honor roll student in his senior year.
Captain of the water polo team.
The middle child of three, he was a star in his own right.
A well liked, "grounded" boy, who had his future ahead of him.
He never exhibited any "signs".
There were no cries for help.
This lovely boy took his life at such an early age.
No one saw it coming.
No one could have known.
Now the family is left wondering.
Not how...but WHY?
Not when...but WHY??
Not where...but WHY???
The question will stay with them, as they work through the tears.
I see your family misses you.
They loved you very much.
I'm sorry for the pain.
I'm sorry for the loss.
I vow to hug my boy a little more now.
He will wonder WHY.
But I'd rather he ask me that now
than me having to ask WHY later.
This post is dedicated to our dear friends who lost their nephew this week. No parent should have to bury their child. But when they lose their child at his own hand, they are left looking for answers inside. These parents are top notch. But now they are left wondering where they went wrong.

I pray for this family.

Readers, please hug your children. Remember to talk to them. Appreciate them for who they are, and why they're here. They are part of you. They still need you. Remember that...and cherish that.

Thank you.


Joyce-Anne said...

I'm so sorry for this family. It's so hard losing a child at any stage of life--but when life is just's even harder. My thoughts and prayers are with your friends today and in the days to come.

Easton Ellsworth said...

Grandy, thank you for posting this. My prayers and very best wishes fly toward that family today. May they find peace and healing.

Mrs. F said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mrs. F said...

Eww, lots of death this weekend. My friends buried their stillborn daughter yesterday afternoon, and two of my dear friends lost two grandpas.

My heart goes out to your friend's family. Suicide is a confusing, heartbreaking loss.

Mrs. G. said...


dkuroiwa said...

...and for some questions, there are no answers...may never be any answers. I hope that family finds strength in the love of those around them.
How tragic.

mysecondjournal said...

I'm SO sorry for your friends family. I pray for peace..

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

You just described my oldest son last year--who is so happy at college this fall. How could this be?

I will be thinking of all of you.

Travis said...

I'm so sorry for this terrible loss.

Nanci's Foibles said...

Life is so short and so darn precious. The WHY may never be answered- Hug and Love constantly!!

Grandy said...

Joyce-Anne~ Thank you.

Easton~ Thanks so much for your kind words, and for stopping by.

Mrs. F~ A sucky week indeed.

Mrs. G~ {{hugs}}

DK~ Indeed

Grandy said...

MP~ Thank you hun!

Jenn~ Glad to know he's doing well at college.

Travis~ Thank you.

Nanci~ Hugging as we speak. ;)

Is said...

My condolences go to the entire family.

Vixen said...

That is an amazing poem Grandy. My heart goes out to those parents.

You are right about the hugging your children. We have been cherishing a lot around here lately.

Grandy said...

IS~ Thank you. And thank you for stopping by.

Vixen~ Glad you like the poem. It was kind of a rough draft.

ms-teacher said...

This poem touched me deeply. In January, my daughter attempted to take her life. She has suffered with depression for six years (since she was 13). There is a real sense of helplessness when it's your child who is suffering and you really don't know how to help them.

Part of the problem for these young people is that there is still such a stigma associated with mental illness. Every day with my daughter is a gift. I wish that this family didn't have to suffer the loss of this young man.

Grandy said...

Thank you, Ms-Teacher, for sharing your own story. It's very touching. I'm thrilled that it has worked out for you both, and pray she overcomes her struggles.

Miss Julie said...

So sorry to hear about your nephew. I know some kids who struggle with depression, and it's so difficult on everyone. I'm doing some volunteer work for this non-profit, which has an online screening tool for parents. I like their approach, and they work with top educators and doctors, trying to spread the word, and fight stigma. Best wishes for you and yours.

Grandy said...

Miss Julie~ Thank you so much for the info and your kind thoughts.