Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Would you still vote for Grandy?

One of my blogging buds, whom I truly admire, over at Derfwad Manor recently did a great post(okay, I really <3 all of her posts) but this one made me think.

What's that? Yes, Grandy does think...On occasion...when there's nothing else to do...and only until it hurts.

Why Mrs. G Could Never Run for Office is a good reminder that although people shouldn't be, they are quite often judged by who they associate with. She specifically was referring to the comparisons between Obama and the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, and how those might translate to her and her Grandmother.

To Mrs. G I say, MRS. G FOR PRESIDENT!! THIS COUNTRY COULD USE A DIFFERENT DERFWAD!!!

Alrighty, Grandy is digressing again.

Anywho...this got me to think...there are way more reasons the Grandy name won't be gracing the inside of the White House any time soon, and it's not because of my dear Grandmother. Oh, and if Gopher (Fred Grandy) happens to catch my blog, I know you may have had aspirations for that, with being a Congressman and all, but um...well...sorry.

So, without further ado, here are 6 reasons why Grandy could run for office but would never win.

1) Grandy says what she thinks too much. - I know this surprises all of you to no end. But really, my diplomacy can only go so far. I don't get into discussing politics or religion too much on this blog because I was always told those are two subjects that are not polite to discuss in public. But believe me, I have opinions.

2) Grandy has a... (are you ready for this?)... a... PAST! - There!!! I admit it... There might have been a couple of times where I made poor choices. Maybe more than a couple? Okay 3, but that's it. Maybe just 4...or 40. You get my point. Who doesn't have skeletons in their closet...sleeping with other skeletons. (Oh, is that just my closet?)

3) Grandy doesn't want to watch herself on SNL - Seriously? Could Amy Pohler still do me? Or maybe the smart & cute Tina Fey could come back, host the show, and play Grandy. Ok...maybe I'll take this off the list.

4) Grandy doesn't SUCK UP!! - No really...Remember my top reason up there? That say what I think thing? Do you really think someone who tells the CEO of a large company that she thought "Upper management needed to stop catering to the wah wah's of middle management" is really going to score well with those campaign contributors? I'm thinkin' Nahhhhh!!

5) Grandy hates telemarketers! - Look, we've all had our share of bad jobs. I even did my stint as a Kirby telemarketer when I was 18. Secretly, I think I just liked saying Electrolux (because it rhymes with s***s). But what's with the politicians getting the word out on our phones now? Do they really think that in today's society, we're not going to know who they are?? As a side note, Ty thought it was awesome when we were getting calls from "The Terminator".

And lastly???

6) Grandy doesn't care. - Now, this statement could easily be mis-interpreted in many ways. It's not that she doesn't care about the world, the environment, society, our schools, our children, etc. It's that she doesn't care whether or not you agree with her thoughts on the world, the environment, society, our schools, etc. She doesn't care if you think she should dress differently, wear a different shade of lipstick, fix my hair another way, or wear skirts instead of pants.

I'm so sorry if this means my son doesn't have a chance either...something about that past thing... but look, with these things on my resume, would you still vote for Grandy?

21 comments:

Sandy C. said...

I'd so vote for you. I'd even place one of your campaign stickers on my nekkid car bumper :)

Suzanne said...

Heck, yeah! I would SO vote for you. It's time America didn't have a suck up in office! :)

Mrs. G. said...

You would get my vote. My past would never cut it. I inhaled...in the eighties and more than once.

Mrs. G. said...

What's sad is no normal joe can ever get elected.

Melissa said...

I'd be good with everything except #6. Only because as an elected official you're SUPPOSED to care about what everyone else wants! ;) Unless of course you wanted the exact same things that I did on every issues. Then #6 wouldn't be a problem ;) The rest? Heck yeah I'd vote for you! All the way!

treesflowersbirds said...

lol! Well, I have all those same reasons as well so heck yeah - I'd vote for you! Birds of a feather and all that. Lordy does this mouth of mine with zero edit function get me in trouble a LOT.

Dens said...

Okay, Mar, you know I would soooo vote for you...after all some of your PAST involves me...hehehe... not to mention the fact that you were my campaign manager in High School...and we actually managed to win!!
I also agree with the one about not caring what others think and all..and I too have my own opinions...lol.

we could make bumper stickers ya know..hmmm...that could be scary...hehehe

MP said...

I have a secret..well not really..But I Was an Elected Official. I was the committeewoman for my district..on the St Louis City ballet and everything. people voted for ME.. I was unapposed but STILL!!
Eventually my goal was to continue in politics..it was those skeletons that made me stop!

XUP said...

I can't wait for you not to run for office so I can not jump on your bandwagon and help you not put up lawn posters and then I'll make a point of not voting for you and later I won't blame you for everything that goes wrong in the country.

Jennifer H said...

Those are all the reasons I WOULD vote for Grandy!

But, then again, I'm a liberal.

storyteller said...

I’m catching up today on your last 4 posts all at once. I’m sorry for the loss of your Grandfather and your Grandmother’s failing health after her fall. My prayers are with you all. I don’t believe much in either ‘luck’ or ‘superstition’ … but I do believe we’re ‘spiritual beings’ having a ‘physical’ experience. Your ‘storm’ story reminds me of a similar experience I had while fishing on June Lake near Yosemite with my ‘ex’ decades ago. I wouldn’t want to run for political office ever, but I just might vote for YOU!
Hugs and blessings,

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

It's an unfortunate truism that by the time you do what it takes to get elected, you're probably not the person we'd like to see elected.

I'm especially suspicious of anyone with no past!

Grandy said...

Sandy~ Not the NEKKID bumper?? I'm honored!!

Suzanne~ Thanks!!

Mrs. G~ Me too...but not in the eighties. Wanna be my running mate?

Melissa~ Silly...I said I care about people. I just don't care if people care about me. Make sense? I need a nap.

Trees~ Ok...let's take a class together on "How to Hold Our Tongues".

Dens~ Let's make magnets instead. You know how I hate bumper stickers.

Grandy said...

MP~ I'll come over and vote for you for SURE!

XUP~ WHEW!! Narrowly dodged that bullet!!

Jennifer~ And a cute one to boot!!

storyteller~ Thanks for all your catch up. :)

Jenn~ I probably wouldn't even vote for me if I had to become one of those.

Michele said...

You'd have my vote in a heartbeat! Ah, I did the telemarketer thing too. I was quite good at it though. :-) Chatty, I am! Made lots of sales too!

Thanks for your great comments on my recent posts. I replied to you over there. I'm glad to be back too!

*newsflash*

I'm in the process of moving to WordPress! I told you about it in my reply.

*smiles*
Michele

dkuroiwa said...

Okay....so not only would I vote for you....but, I'd have your back. I can relate to oh so much of what is on your list, so, I could you know like be, no, not your running partner (too much 'splainin to do that way!) but, more like your political (or whatever-ical) advisor...I've gotten myself out of some pretty sticky situations, I know what I'm doing. I'd be there if you needed.

Grandy said...

Michele~ I would follow you anywhere. Wordpress huh? Bring it on!!

dk~ Thanks for watchin' my back girlie!!

Travis said...

I'm so with you on #6. I just don't care if everyone agrees with me. Plus I don't really care to argue with people.

People have different opinions and I think that's ok.

Grandy said...

Travis~ You're so right. What the heck fun would it be if we all agreed??

Tina Coruth said...

Grandy,
I'd vote for you! You have something that has been missing in the president of the US for a long time. You have a working brain!! (And your good sense of humor could come in handy, too!)

Grandy for President!
Tina

Grandy said...

Tina~ It's official...you're on the campaign trail with me. Moral support it is! :)